Every time...
Every time I close my eyes and open them again.
I see them, feel them, all over again.
Every memory I've lived
Every word
Every laugh
I relive in a flash, a matter of seconds, feeling frozen in time
It's like being blinded instantly for a moment and not being cautious of my surroundings
As every tear sheds another memory is gained while one is lost.
For moments at a time I'm lost, trying to find myself
Who I am, what I want, what I need, what I'm meant to have.
It's like being as lost as the sound of a howl in the night.
Like the stars in the sky, distant, fades, hard to hear, but then returns in another place, in another way.
Every memory as fluid and deep as the crystal night sea of Rio de janeiro.
As reflective as the moon's image.
As every thought and word replays in my head as if there's no time in the world
Every memory relived in a matter of seconds
Sometimes wishing you could change it, bend it, or even destroy it.
They all collide in one coming to several possible outcomes of the desires of the heart and the realities of the mind.
The memory of breathing for the first time
The memory of seeing for the first time
The memory of feeling for the first time
The memory of hearing a melodious heartbeat for the first time.
Feeling anothers heartbeat pulse, and change, responding to your every being
Knowing they belong to you in more ways imaginable.
The memory of loving for the first time.
Each memory is like the rain, falling and merging into another, always flowing, never changing
The only difference is the size.
The memory of feeling death for the first time
The loss of breath along with the loss of blood
Feeling weak and like I'm already gone
The loss of warmth from the skin
The loss of color as the skin turns pale and frigid. As I see every memory once more, of my life flashing before my eyes. I feel the beat of my heart slowing, fading, becoming lost.
As in to die and wake up to it again once more
