"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along."
The days that followed had been the same, I woke up, had breakfast in the dining hall and then Four and I would go to the simulation room to either face a new fear or conquer the same once. Until now I've had five different fears: spiders, abandonment, losing control, being controlled and loosing someone I loved. The more fears I got, the darker they were and I feared that my ultimate fear would be the darkest.
The morning after the celebration party had been pretty awkward. Neither Eric nor I really remember anything except the fact that we had almost gone beyond second base, luckily we had stopped before anything happened. I didn't want my first real time to be while drunk and careless. Sure I was not a virgin anymore thanks to the almighty Michael, father of the year, but I had never experienced real sex before. The kind of Sex everyone is talking about. I had never felt the joy or the pleasure Sex could give you. Heck I'd never had an orgasm before so yes I wanted my first time to be all about that, I wanted my first time to be special and with someone I loved. I wanted it with Eric. Eric had been supervising my fear simulations with Four ever since my first fear, I guess he wanted to see how good I was doing.
We were currently in the simulation room and I was about to go under the sim.
"Remember, calm your heart rate or find a way out. Be brave." Four said when he had injected me with the needle. I closed my eyes and let the simulation take over me.
I was in a dark room, much like in my first fear. I looked around, trying to find a source of light but there was none. I closed my eyes hoping that this wasn't the same fear as the first one, the one with all the spiders, I hated spiders. All of a sudden the light flickered and I was met with a blinding light. When I had adjusted my eyes to the light I could clearly see that I was not alone. Before me were all my friends, bounded behind chairs and with gags in their mouths. I looked horrified at them, Matt, Noah, Meg, Levina, Kev, Lip, Four and Eric. Behind them stood a few Dauntless soldiers, Max and Jeanine, all smiling and with guns in their hands except for Jeanine. Max walked over to me and handed me a gun.
"Candice, this is your final test in order to become Dauntless." He said while looking at me with cold eyes.
"What do you want me to do?" I asked confused.
"I want you to shoot all of them except one, you can only save one of them." Max said coldly and my eyes begin to tear as I shook my head.
"No please, I can't do it."
"It's the only way you'll be in Dauntless. We train soldiers Candice, not cowards. Now shoot them!" He screamed and all I could do was shake my head, I couldn't do it, I couldn't shoot the people I loved.
Suddenly the sound of a safety from what sounded like a gun was heard and I felt something cold and hard on my temple. Max was pressing a gun to my head.
"I said shoot." Tears were rolling down my face as I lifted the gun and pulled off the safety, ready to shoot.
"I'm sorry." I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and fired the gun.
And everything went black.
I woke up with a gasp. Sweat was forming on my forehead and I was breathing rapidly. Even though I knew it was all just a simulation it all felt so real. That was one of my worst fears so far, being forced to kill the people I loved. Fortunately since I was Divergent I knew it wasn't real and I choose to kill myself instead, seeing as I was not going to kill the people I loved.
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You die, I die too (Slow Update)Fanfiction
What can you say about Candice Heart? Brave, outspoken, humble, beautiful? Everyone seems to have something to say about her but do they really know her? They say everyone has secrets, Candice definitely has but can she keep them hidden or are they...