My light.My darkness (MxM) (V SLOW UPDATE)

chapter 5

Working for this company comes with 2 privileges, The 1st one is that I don't have to wear any suits, casual appropriate clothing but no suit required of me

For the 2ed privilege, I have my own office- it's really small but still mine and I don't have to share it, the one who assigned me here did it out of hate- he's a pack member that I still remember and he obviously 'still' remembers me after all those years, He couldn't fire me because he doesn't have that kind of authority BUT he have the authority to assign me here- to what he thought is the worst place ever anyone can work at, Well.. it is in an isolated corner where no one even look at and I'm pretty sure it was a storage room before. But I'm honestly pretty happy with it. I can't imagine myself sharing with other people when it's definitely loud and messy, and i'm not wanted there to begin with.

 I don't have to wear my usual expressionless face and put my guard up Because in moments like 'these' where I'm on the verge of tears and heartbroken it's when I thank god I'm in this tiny office all by myself

Too shocked to evade why'Zeus is even here- the words he said keep playing in my mind over and over again.

       I wish I never saw him again

I thought that day would be the first and the last but it wasn't, Now what am I going to do? I wasn't prepared for this

How could fate be this cruel?

How he could be this cruel?

Doesn't he care that I'm dying because of him? Not even a little?

Isn't it unfair? All those mate fantasies I had just vanished with three words from him. Why is this so messed up? I never asked for this. So why am I dying? I never asked for rejection - I asked for a mate.

I asked for love

Nobody is cruel enough to reject a mate, because the rejected one dies, Everyone knows that- so why did he do it? Why does he get to move on with his life and I get to die? I didn't even start my life yet

All I did before was make it through day by day, I wanted a warm home, A warm body to- to ...cuddle.

What's so wrong with that? Am I asking for too much? What's so wrong with wanting a warm body to cuddle with?

Someone answer me. Please.

      Blinking back the wetness in my eyes I drag myself out of my thoughts, I can't keep doing this! Its poisoning

Suddenly my stomach cramps like a herd of elephants squishing my organs- biles rises up my throat scorching the delicate tissue there. I bolt upright and dash to the small bin next to my office door, I sink to the floor next to it, I gag and choke as my ab muscles painfully flex and sweat breaks out of my face but there's nothing really to throw up, I don't even remember the last time I ate, There's only stomach acid and... Blood- 

god

My nose is bleeding again. It's not even small drops. No, it's like a deep gash wound. I reach out and grab a tissue from my coat's pocket, tilt my head back against the closed door and hold the tissue to my nose. it's not  doing anything to stop the bleeding. It was socked within seconds.

my vision blurs so I just sit, close my eyes and waited it out.

I feel so drained

I wasn't here for even an hour and I already want to go home. But I have work to do, that's what I come here for and I hope nothing else happen. I had enough accidents for one day.