Act III, scene i

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[OLIVIA'S garden.]

Enter VIOLA, and Clown with a tabour

VIOLA

Save thee, friend, and thy music: dost thou live by

thy tabour?

Clown

No, sir, I live by the church.

VIOLA

Art thou a churchman?

Clown

No such matter, sir: I do live by the church; for

I do live at my house, and my house doth stand by

the church.

VIOLA

So thou mayst say, the king lies by a beggar, if a

beggar dwell near him; or, the church stands by thy

tabour, if thy tabour stand by the church.

Clown

You have said, sir. To see this age! A sentence is

but a cheveril glove to a good wit: how quickly the

wrong side may be turned outward!

VIOLA

Nay, that's certain; they that dally nicely with

words may quickly make them wanton.

Clown

I would, therefore, my sister had had no name, sir.

VIOLA

Why, man?

Clown

Why, sir, her name's a word; and to dally with that

word might make my sister wanton. But indeed words

are very rascals since bonds disgraced them.

VIOLA

Thy reason, man?

Clown

Troth, sir, I can yield you none without words; and

words are grown so false, I am loath to prove

reason with them.

VIOLA

I warrant thou art a merry fellow and carest for nothing.

Clown

Not so, sir, I do care for something; but in my

conscience, sir, I do not care for you: if that be

to care for nothing, sir, I would it would make you invisible.

VIOLA

Art not thou the Lady Olivia's fool?

Clown

No, indeed, sir; the Lady Olivia has no folly: she

will keep no fool, sir, till she be married; and

fools are as like husbands as pilchards are to

herrings; the husband's the bigger: I am indeed not

her fool, but her corrupter of words.

VIOLA

I saw thee late at the Count Orsino's.

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