(BABY/DEATH) 19

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Nineteen

Baby

  Loki was mean. Here I was willing to join in. Willing to help out and he said no. It was scary though. Not knowing where Shiki was. Not knowing when he would attack or if you would be next. Stupid Ian’s. Stupid, mean, sucky, jerk Ian’s. They always leave me alone like I’m not important. And I already told Dian no already. Plus there was no one that I was crawling back to Nian side. After all these years there were just no way that I was going to let him have the honor of seeing me beg to be taken in.

            I frowned my face when my thoughts about Nian and Dian brought me to their side of the brain. I looked around to see if any of them were watching as I wondered to my safe room. I haven’t been in this room since Nian abandoned to the right side of the brain. I pushed it opened and went in. My room my safe room was just how I remembered it. With countless toys lying around it was every kid’s dream and yet I couldn’t make myself happy.

            It was sad even I knew that. Evian dying was something sad. We all should be in tears right now. We all should be together holding on to what little we have left. But none of the other Ian’s cared. The older Ian’s were too stuck on themselves to care about others. They were too busy licking their own wounds to care about everyone else.

            “Don’t cry Tam.” The voice of my room spoke. It spoke my true name when it called to me and I frowned at her words. It’s been a long time since I heard her. A long time since I needed her, wanted her, was in this room to hear her. Don’t cry she said. How could I not cry? Even I knew that Evian’s death was something to cry over. Even I knew that Evian should have been the last of us to go.

            “I’m just like Evian.” I whispered. “No one wants me either.”

            “You don’t know that. Vigil might want you. You belong on his side in the first face.” I only shook my head at the idea of being with Nian. He decided years ago that he didn’t want me. That he didn’t need me. And what good was I to King. “You can’t lose hope Tam.”

            “You’re right.” I said walking over to the door and placing my hand on the knob.

            “You can’t lose what you never had to start with.” I said and left the room.

            My eyes opened and I was sitting on the bed in the room. Bags were packed but they were only Loki and Hades things. I sighed as I packed for myself and all the others. I was never coming back to this house. We didn’t even need these things. We would have been fine leaving it here to rot. It wasn’t even like the people in the house cared if we lived here or not. They probably will be happier that we are leave. Mommy will be happy that I’m leaving. I grabbed as many bags as I could and walked downstairs with them.

            “Where do you think you’re going?” Billy was the one that hissed out and I looked at him. My words froze in my throat. I didn’t have any cusses to say to him. I didn’t know any witty lines to insult him with. I wasn’t like the other Ian’s. They would have thought of something mean and cruel to say to our brother. I just stood there.

            “Ian.” Father said and tossed me some keys. I caught them out of the air and looked down at them. “Happy birthday.” He said and I remembered them getting out of the car that had the bow on it the other night. It must have been for me then. They gave me a car for my birthday. But that didn’t really change anything.

            “You’re just going to let him leave Jim.” Uncle Joe said he was standing up now his arms folded across his chest as he frowned at father.

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