Ordinarily, I'd be mentally preparing myself for another gruelling Monday with a rousing playlist (which presently consisted of a mix of older and newer Fall Out Boy tracks, good old My Chemical Romance and Echo & the Bunnymen.) But the music couldn't draw my attention from the bathroom mirror, where I was stood.
I just couldn't look away, despite every passing second ticking away and the awareness that I would end up holding up Amanda or Toby.
For so long, I'd been used to simply washing and clothing without a thought.
Now, I studied my face until my eyes lost focus and could only see mess of tangled hair, pale skin, rouge lips, and purplish stains under the cold eyes that stared back at me. A metallic twang filled my mouth and nostrils, and my eyes sharply focused.
I'd bitten against my cracked lips until they had begun to bleed, the rouge droplets only brightening them, highlighting how rosebud shaped my lips were.
My fingers slid my jumper, tugging at the fraying hem until the material was as near skin tight as I could make it. The slight curve of my chest was just visible, and the metallic taste had grown to resemble the feel of bile.
'Can they all see it too? Can they see how I'm never right, how I never fit?'
A whine came through the keyhole, "Taylor? I'm waaaiiiting, I really need a-"
"Yeah, just a sec, Toby," I hurriedly replied, relaxing the jumper and flicking some cold water into my face. I didn't look in the mirror again, running my tongue over my lower lip to get rid of any remaining blood.
Toby had burst through the door, and I quickly slipped past him. The thought of school hardly helped the nauseous feeling. I cast a longing glance at my unmade bed, the pillow still squished from where I'd laid my head.
'You know it'd be so easy to go back to sleep. Just tell Amanda you're feeling sick, it's not like you'd have to fake it...No. I can't worry her. I have to go to school. At least it isn't as lonely as being stuck inside my head.'
The thought of the company of Doug, but Lily in particular, was enough to spur me to grab my iPod and head downstairs.
Cycling always helped, and up until I was actually going into school the dull sense of dread had been alleviated somewhat. My iPod burnt a hole in my blazer as I walked round to form, filled with a yearning for some crashing melody to drown out everything but drums and the screech of guitar.
I arrived to an empty form room, which suited me just fine, and took up my place in the bottom corner, slipping my earphones in.
Up until 8:58 AM, it had been the usual Monday morning: me sat alone, separate from the gossip and conversations that people brought with them as they drifted into form via my earphones; the smashing of drums just loud enough to remind anyone who decided to venture towards me to keep their distance. Doug wouldn't join me for at least another three minutes, depending on how late he was running.
I watched as the final few stragglers came through the door, suddenly realising that I had a pretty good view of the classroom for once. Bitch society's table, which should have been filled with blonde, brunette and the odd ginger head to block me by then, was empty.
At first, I figured that they had some emergency, like one of them ran out of lipstick or something. Except testosterone table was missing their captain too.
This had something to do with Lily.
'God, it's got to the point where I'm freaking out about her, how pathetic can I get?'
A sudden silence swept rapidly across the room as the door burst open and slammed against its frame, drawing everyone's attention. Lily had stormed in, Dan at her heels, and bitch society trailing behind. All I could focus upon was the inferno that was Lily. She must've been conscious of her twenty two peers staring, but her features were ablaze with a consuming anger. Whoever had pissed her off should probably run now.
YOU ARE READING
"If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, then it is a duck." Taylor Adams and Lily Baker: complete opposites in almost every sense. Taylor Adams: completely themselves when appearing and acting as androgynously as their name suggests, even if i...