Living In My Head (Drarry)

Chapter 65: Points of Interest

A.N.

Chapter song: About You by XXYYXX

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We breach the subject of my parents in the only way we really can, we use it as a way to fill the silence. I'm on my second sandwich, Severus and Sirius on their third, and Remus is still on his first. I clear my throat before speaking, I wish I hadn't because everyone stops mid-chew.

"So, I was wondering," I offer, trying to find words to say to retract my poor excuse at starting a very morbid conversation. I don't find any, so I stumble along.

"I wanted us to all meet here to talk about my parents. I want to know everything about what happened." I pull my collar away from my throat, suddenly feeling choked by nervousness. "I know bits and pieces. I've seen it through the eyes of the police and morticians, I've seen it through Severus's eyes, but now I want to hear it from you two." I exhale sharply, "Especially you two. The police files listed you two as prime suspects in their murder. There must have been a reason why."

Sirius speaks up, Remus still oddly focused on eating his sandwich, "We were suspects because we all went to school together. James, Lily, Severus here, as well as everyone you probably saw on that suspect list went to school with us. Peter, Bellatrix, Tom, and all of us were in the same graduating class." He took a sip of his lemonade but didn't set the glass down, favoring holding it in his palms.

"Tom was a smart kid, he was fairly well-received by his peers and he gained a small following. This following, once we all graduated, quickly evolved into a cult, the Death Eaters. Out of our group of friends, only Peter joined. He was Tom's personal whistleblower and informant, he was deceived into believing Tom's lies and he became lost to us. He told Riddle where your parents were vulnerable and it was that night they were killed. Lupin and I didn't know until it was too late, when we were brought in for questioning. We tried to help, point fingers in the right direction, but with Tom already dead they figured the cult would disband and that would be the end of it, but they were wrong. They're still active, not as they were when Tom was The Capricorn Killer, but they definitely still exist."

"How do you know?" I ask, worried. What if they wanted to finish what he started and kill me too?

"I know because they're the ones who put me in jail."

"What do you mean?"

"Since you've read the police files, I suppose you already know Remus and I got convicted as accessories to your parents' murders. The legal team who convinced the jury we had a part in their deaths were actually part of the Death Eaters, the new cult leader was the prosecutor."

A memory flows through my mind like water "the Desitas law firm". I suddenly feel sick. This can't be happening. The phonetics even spell it out, for Christ's sake.

"The Desitas law firm? Lucius Malfoy is the cult leader?" I ask, praying I'm wrong.

"Yes," Remus interrupted, his sandwich finally finished. "He is. I'm sorry, Harry."

Sorry? Did he know about Draco and I? He at least suspected, probably. Maybe. I'm just so confused right now.

"I need to think." I say abruptly, standing and stumbling my way down the ledge toward the beach. It feels as though I can't breathe anymore.

Once my shoes hit the hard sand, I pull hard at my beaten shoes and pull off my socks to set them on a rock. I don't bother to roll up my pants legs, I just sit at the edge of the tide, my toes in the wet sand and watching the horizon with a sense of loneliness. The boy I love is indirectly involved with my parents' deaths. How can one live with something like that weighing on their mind?

It was extremely indirect, at best his father didn't even know Tom killed my parents, which is unlikely. However, I don't think I can force myself to believe something like that when it has such a microscopic chance of it being true. Lucius was head of the trial that put Sirius and Remus behind bars, there is no way he couldn't have not known about Tom's plan. The real question is whether or not Draco knows about his father, more so Tom's involvement with Draco's father, and if he did know- how long did he plan on keeping all of that from me?

At some point my thoughts turn to static and I am staring blankly at the water, the salty tide lapping up on the shore. I hear Severus's heavy steps in the sand before I feel his hand on my shoulder. It feels anchoring and it brings me back out of whatever abyss I was in.

"We should go now, your friends will be missing you."

I nod half-heartedly and stand, walking with him back towards our shoes and socks. After we put them on, we climb into the car, everyone already inside and ready to go. Sirius starts the car and the trip begins.

Halfway back, Severus sets a flip-phone in my hand. He doesn't say anything, just gives me a small smile then turns to watch out the window. I open it, all the basic settings already chosen. I take my time going through all the options until I have it the way I like it. Hogwarts looms along the skyline ahead and my heart sinks. It's here that I have to face the truth.

Draco and I are beyond repair now and there is nothing either of us can really do about that. I watch Sirius as he hums along to some ballad on the radio. I believe what he said. Something about him instills a confidence in my certainty of what he's said. Now all I need to be thinking about is school, soccer practice, the yule ball, and my new life.

Not Draco. My new life without Draco. That feels like it'll be a hard pill to swallow.

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A.N.

Uploading this chapter before the rest of the story so you guys will still stick with me! xD I'm getting there, I promise.