All Down Hill From Here

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Emma's POV

We stood in line as girls came up, giving us tight hugs and asking for pictures. Shawn was on my right and Cameron was on my left on the end of the line. Throughout the meet and greet we laughed and joked around with our fans. It was so much fun. Until a girl in way too short shorts and a crop top came up to Shawn.

"OMG, I LOVE YOU." What she did next surprised us all. She kissed him.

On the lips.

My eyes went from Shawn and the girl to Cameron looking at me with sadness."You okay?" He mouthed. I couldn't speak. I couldn't even nod my head yes or no. With tears threatening to spill I turned my head and looked everywhere but at my best friend locking lips with some girl.

"Hey, it's okay. I can tell he doesn't feel anything." Cameron leaned over and whispered in my ear.

"How do you know?" I whispered barely audible.

"Because, no guy likes to be kissed by some psychotic fangirl." I couldn't help but let out a laugh. I turned to see Cameron smiling at me. "There's that pretty smile." I could feel a blush creep up my neck and onto my cheeks.

He then leaned forward and kissed my cheek. "Stay strong, babe." I smiled to myself as I watched him turn the other away. My eyes left Cameron and landed on a confused Shawn.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing. Just an inside joke." I said turning around and taking a picture with a girl. After a few more people, the last girl in my line was the girl.

The girl who just made out with my best friend.

I looked at Cameron with a worried look. He made the motion of taking a deep breathe. As I did so, Shawn looked between the two of us confused.

"Hi. What's your name?" I asked with a smile on my face.

"Save it." She said through a fake smile. She came up and gave me a tight hug. Almost too tight. "Stay away from Shawn you fugly slut. He never will love you. He's mine. Why would he love an ugly bitch like you?" With that she turned on her heels and left.

I was left standing there in shock. "Emma?"

Before Shawn could say anything else, Cam rushed to my side. "What did she say? Emma? Please. Tell me what she said to you so I can tell you it's not true. Emma. Emma. Emma!?"

I was brought out of my thoughts when Cameron started shaking me. "What?"

"You okay?" I could see the concern in Cam's eyes. I looked around to see the other guys and our fans looking at me with worry. I laughed to hopefully help them relax.

"Yeah. I just zoned out. I do that sometimes." I shrugged off his hands and walked past him.

Before I could get away, he caught my wrist. "Emma. I'm not stupid. I know she said something to you."

"Relax Cameron. She just said how big of a fan she was and how much she loved that there was a girl mixed in with all your testosterone." I laughed before walking away. I could tell by the look on his face that he didn't believe a word I just said.

The show went on with the guys messing around and a lot of off-key singing. Finally we were all tiredly walking back to our rooms. "I'm so tired." I yawned.

"Here," Cam stopped in front of me and bent down so I could hop on his back, which of course I did. He then proceeded to carry me to my room. I reached in my back pocket and handed him my key. He unlocked the door and dropped my on my bed as carefully as he could. I tucked under the covers and snuggled into the pillow.

"I'll come wake you an hour before dinner." Cameron laughed kissing my forehead and leaving.

I decided to stand up and take a shower. As I got out a few minutes later I pulled on my undergarments and looked at my reflection. I looked like I was ill but I felt like I was fat. My hair was boring, so were my eyes. My lips were small. Lips...

The kiss.

Everything  the girl said to me rushed back and hit me like a ton of bricks. Tears started to fall as I put on a pair of soffe shorts and tank top and continued to look at my reflection in the mirror. She was right. I was ugly. Shawn would never go for a girl like me. No guy would. Why can't I be prettier? Why can't I be skinnier? Why can't I have guys wanting to date me? Why did I have to be so ugly?

For the first time in weeks, I reached into my special zipper in my makeup bag. I know I promised Cameron but I can't handle the pain right now.

I walked back into the room and sat on the floor leaning against the end of my bed. Biting my lip, I slide the blade across my wrist feeling the familiar sting. I usually stop after once but it was like my hand had a mind of its own. It slide the blade against my skin again. And again. And again. And again.

Suddenly I heard something that sounded like a door opening. "Emma?" But by then, my vision was blurry so I couldn't see who it was that continued calling my name.

"Shawn?" I said weakly before dark surrounded me.

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