"Hoy, babai-ta! Nilalamok na ako dito sa harap ng gate niyo!" my best friend, Noelle's voice rang against my ear. I rolled my eyes. It was a lie. She just wants me to be quick. May dala siyang kotse at kung hindi siya lalabas mula sa loob, hindi siya sisipsipin ng mga lamok.
"I'm on my way out!" I yelled-whispered. Hindi ko na hinintay ang sagot niya at mabilis na ibinaba ang tawag bago ibinulsa ang phone.
Inangat ko ang gig bag ko mula sa ibabaw ng kama. Isinukbit ko ang strap sa balikat ko. I turned my phone on silent, just in case she decides to annoy me with another call. I needed to move like a damn ninja once I get through the door.
A grin was immediately plastered on my face as soon as I stepped out of my room. Huminga ako ng malalim para malanghap ang amoy ng pagiging malaya. Napahawak ako sa ibabaw ng dibdib ko. Sa bawat hakbang na ginagawa ay mas lalo akong napapangiti.
Hindi naman na bago sa akin ang pagtakas tuwing gabi. I've done it so many times. Mas masaya lang ngayon sa feeling dahil nakukuha kong tumakas kahit na grounded ako.
Hindi naman ako rebelde. I just really have a penchant for disorder. It's my... drug. I love the thrill and comfort that it brings me. It makes me feel free.
Freedom. One of the many things that my mother taught me.
My mom had taught me a lot of things. She taught me about music. She taught me how to play guitar. She taught me that smiling is the nicest thing that you could do for someone. She taught me how to dance like no one's watching. She taught me to enjoy the rain. She taught me about being free. She taught me about wings and that everyone could fly if they badly wanted to.
Nine years old ako nang ibinigay ni Mommy sa akin ang isang silver necklace na may pendant na pakpak. Sinabi niya sa akin na iyon ang dating niyang pakpak at ibinibigay niya na sa akin dahil magkakaroon na siya ng panibago.
I was happy to receive it, of course. As a kid, my head was filled with fantasies of flying in the sky just like what my mother told me. Nang ibigay niya sa akin iyon ay agad ko iyong sinuot. Nagmamadali akong umakyat sa desk at sinubukang tumalon para makita kung makakalipad nga ako. My mother lied. I didn't fly, I fell. And it hurt like a btch.
I cried and yelled at her for lying to me. I asked her why I couldn't fly. My mother laughed and told me that I was too young to understand. That I'd learn how to fly when I get older. Then she made me promise that when I finally learn how to fly, I'd never stop and that I will always keep on flying. I gave her my promise and kissed her goodnight after saying how much I love her. The next day, she died.
I've had a thing for trouble since then. The mere thought of defying a situation gives me rush. It's why I'm so enticed to do it. I do things that I do because whenever I break the norm, I feel free and whenever I feel free, I feel like I'm just a step closer to my mom. It makes me feel like I'm flying.
Nang makalabas ako ng mansion ay alam kong hindi pa ako tapos. I will still need to pass the guard house. I mentally crossed fingers, silently praying that our guard fell asleep. My prayers were immediately answered when I saw Kuya Roger snoring inside his small station.
Maingat na maingat kong binuksan ang maliit na gate upang makalabas na ako. Inayos ko ang strap na nakasabit sa balikat ko dahil nangangalay na iyon sa bigat. My whole body stilled when the gate shrieked. Maliit na ingay lang iyon pero parang malakas dahil sa sobrang lalim na ng gabi.
Nagbilang ako ng ilang segundo bago nakahinga ng maluwag at umayos ng tayo. My heart was beating so fast that it felt like imaginary wings were flapping behind my back.
Ngiting tagumpay ako nang lumapit ako sa sasakyan at binuksan ang pinto ng backseat para ilagay ang gig bag ko. Isinara ko iyon at mabilis na sumakay sa passenger seat. Kating-kati na ako umalis mula dito.
BINABASA MO ANG
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