in my many years of reading fanfiction, i have come across far too many mary sue stories.
instead of writing about the many aspects of mary sueism, here is a lil story for you that i think will better explain how generic mary sue stories often are. prepare yourself.
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RING RING RING
I woke up and groaned at my alarm clock, smashing it to the ground and breaking it into pieces even though it probably cost a lot of money. I give zero fucks.
"SHADOW GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW YOUR DUMB ASS JUST BROKE THE FOURTH ALARM CLOCK THIS WEEK," my evil step mother yelled. She's been taking care of me ever since my real mother died when I "accidentally" burnt the house down.
"Just a fucking minute, Gertrude," I yelled down the stairs, using her real name to piss her off.
I hopped off my bed, stepping on broken glass shards from my alarm clock.
I shrugged and kept walking despite the pieces of glass lodged into my feet. Grabbing my hairspray, I walked into the bathroom and sprayed the shit out of my black and green hair until I looked scene enough, making sure you could still see my neko cat ears.
Once I was done, I grabbed my iPhone 6+ that I bought even though I'm apparently poor and started blasting some sick emo music and strumming my electric guitar even though it's not even plugged in to an amp.
"SHADOW SHUT THE FUCK UP AND COME DOWN STAIRS," Gertrude yelled.
I groaned and walked down the stairs quickly.
"WHAT," I yelled.
"I made you some breakfast," Gertrude smiled, throwing a bowl with a single cheerio and a drop of water to serve as milk on to the ground.
I cried, remembering how my mother used to feed me cheerios for breakfast every morning.
"Stop crying before I make you," Gertrude said, stabbing me in the heart thirty seven times.
With my neko powers, I threw Gertrude with all my might and slammed her though five walls, watching as her limp body landed all the way in another continent.
"I'll be back for you, Shadow," Gertrude yelled. I could hear her even though she was far away from me due to my super neko senses.
I looked down, my rainbow colored blood flowing from a hole in my stomach.
"I'll be fine," I yawned before putting on ten coats of eyeliner and walking to school.
When I got to school everyone started pointing and laughing at me, so I ran into the bathroom crying tears of blood and looked at myself in the mirror.
"What's wrong with me?" I sobbed.
"ur ugly," my arch enemy Brittany Waters laughed, throwing me into the glass mirror and shattering it.
"Brittany, why do you hate me?" I cried.
"Because I'm rich and popular," Brittany smiled.
"But we used to be best friends,,,,,?,,,@,,@,,,@,@" I said.
"Yeah, until u fuckin stole my boyfriend in second grade u sack of fucking beans," Broyttany yelled.
"Brittnay u dumb shit Zack was my cousin not my boyfriend," I yelled.
Brittnats eyes softened, "he was ur cousin??????"
"Yes Brigtnay" I smiled at her and we hugged.
"Shadow, you're the best friend in the world," Brignit said as the bell rung and we headed off to class.
While I walked through the hall, someone fuckin hurtled me into the sun. I cried as I fell back to earth, "This must be the end," I whispered.
But just before I hit the ground, I was caught by an emo boy with a mask on.
"Who tf r u," I asked, wonderstuck.
"Blade. Blade Darkness," he said before slam dunking me onto the ground and hopping into the nearest moving truck and riding away.
"Wait! You're the boy who saved me from the fire that killed my mother years ago," I yelled, but he was already gone.
As I stood up, I spotted a piece of paper lying on the ground next to wear Blade had slam fucking dunked me.
"I love you, Shadow, Call me - Blade" the note read.
"SHIT," I yelled in frustration at not being able to catch him.
As I angrily lashed my neko tail, I heard an ambulance ringing behind me.
"We heard you just got thrown into the sun, we must heal you," the doctors said to me.
"NO," I threw the ambulance across the seas in frustration.
I will never step foot into an ambulance again, not after mother died.
She was inside the burning house, and just as she reached the front door, an ambulance backed into the door and crushed her only exit, burning her alive.
"Don't worry, Shadow, I'm still with you," my mother's words echoed through my brain.
Suddenly, I fell to the ground, the large amount of hair on my head causing me to have a heat stroke, and fainted.
{Mr. Brightside plays in the distance}
