My Struggles with Trichotillomania

My Story

Basically, when I was a child, I used to pull my eyelashes out. My parents dismissed it as a phase, and sure enough, it passed. But in May of 2015, I started pulling again, this time from my scalp. I would just sit in bed during an all nighter, watching YouTube, and pull from the top of my head. Then, during the day, I would pull and pull while watching TV. I couldn't control it. Strand after strand, I slowly grew a bald spot on the top of my scalp, where my center parting was. Now, keep in mind that this was during summer vacation. No one ever noticed it, so no one at school could tease me. In early August, my mother saw the bald spot and I confessed. The family met up (Basically me, my dad, my mom, and my older brother) and we decided to try those little foam balls you can get at the store. Mom thought that if I squeeze them in my hands when I have an urge, it might go away. Unfortunately, they didn't work for me for that long, only about a month or so. I hid the big fat bald spot on my head by brushing some hair over it, making it look like I have a side parting. By October, I was pulling again, this time, from the sides of my head. I can see my hair thinning around the "artificial hair line" and I wouldn't be surprised if it turned into a bald spot. Urges in school are the worst, though. Because if someone sees you pull, then rumors fly, people tease you, the usual. Because the only people who know about my disorder are a few close friends and a handful of family members, I must hide it everyday. But to calm the urges, I usually just pull at my eyebrows, as it can look like I am just scratching them. So even though my trich is getting worse, I still have hope for the future. I'm looking at counseling, and hopefully it works. I'll update on here when something big happens, or it continues to go downhill. Thank you for reading :)