About: Frank visit to his husbands grave, aged 34
I sat next to the grey marble grave picking at the grass as the wind whipped my hair, I sighed softly at my husband Gerard and the memories we had before he got Cancer and he lost the battle to it. I hated watching it absorb his body and kill him inside out for a year before the last beep from the machine sounded and I heard the flat line. I also remember crying into his hand with the ring on it and the nurses had to drag me off into the waiting room as they cleared up. I got all his belongings and his comics went to his brother, Cameron Iero Way went to live with her grandma because I was too shitty to look after our own child and that hurt.
"I miss you Gee, so much it hurts" I whimper "Cameron started dating a guy called Matt, he is nice" I inform him while running my fingers smoothly along the cold grave as he felt like he was in the clouds watching me change his flowers weekly and talk about life but on really dark days I wonder if he left me to me spiteful and selfish but that is only because I am lonely.
"Pete asked me out yesterday but I am not ready" I feel a single cold tear slope down my cheeks "I miss you so fucking much" I kiss the grave before getting up to leave sine it is nearly 4 in the afternoon but if I can have 1 wish it would be to see Gerard at least once and even the death hurt me "I cannot kiss you because the hardest part of this is leaving you" I let out a sob again.
He even called himself soggy from the chemo but I always found him the most wise, beautiful, heroic man that I look up to and I am so god damn lucky to have even met the man himself and yet I got the happiness of marrying the man on the 23rd June 2013 but that was 5 years ago and now I am a widowed single father to a daughter. I want to carry on for Cameron but at the same time I want to just end it and be with my husband.
God I miss you Gerard, but I will never stop loving you for I am forever bound to you.
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Hey, Hope your good and better than me since I broke my rib today slipping on ice, it hurt so much and still does but I will carry on and I be broken... Idiot Alex jeez. - ModernBlasphemy
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