*trigger warning*

"We're going to have to talk about this eventually," Parker informed me.

"Talk about what?" I asked, as I stepped into line at Starbucks, my arms folded across my chest.

"The car Lee."

I glanced over at him. "What car?"

He rolled his eyes.

"There's nothing to talk about," I declined.

"There's clearly plenty to talk about."

"I just haven't had the time to deal with it, between Midterms and everything."

"Yeah, I don't really think that's it," Parker said. "And I don't think you do either."

I shifted from one foot to another, willing this Starbucks line to move any faster.

"We don't have to talk about it right now," he continued. "But I'm just letting you know that it's something you can't avoid forever."

He'd be surprised.

"Next!" the barista called out.

"Venti Vanilla Mocha," I said, with a long sigh.

Parker placed his order, something long and complicated, the words of a true Starbucks veteran.

"So we have a meeting with Patricia next week," Parker informed me, as we stepped to the side, waiting on our drinks.

"The lawyer?"

He nodded. "Are you comfortable with that?"

"Well it has to happen eventually."

He nodded, shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants.

We were both silent as we waited for our drinks, but I could feel my heart pounding against my ribcage.

We had a meeting with our lawyer to discuss the logistics of the case. Which meant I was going to have to talk about the suicide.

I'd never spoken about the suicide before, not out loud anyways. How ready was I to finally break that silence?

~*~

"So did you make any New Year's Resolutions?" Sharon asked us, to start off our session.

I tipped back my Venti Vanilla Mocha, glancing over at Parker.

"I don't really embrace the whole New Year's Resolution thing," Parker admitted, with a shrug. "If I'm going to make a change, why do I need to wait for the New Year? Why not just make it now?"

"That's a good philosophy to have," Sharon agreed. "As long as you hold to it."

I laughed at that, and Parker shot me a silencing glare.

"But let's just say that you were going to make a New Year's Resolution," Sharon suggested. "What do you think one would be?"

Parker took a sip of his iced coffee, tilting his head to the side as he thought. "Probably to keep a cap on my anger."

"That's a good resolution to have."

"Yeah, easier said than done," Parker muttered, leaning back in his seat.

And then he glanced over at me.

"Lee, what about you?" Sharon asked me. "Any New Year's Resolutions?"

I rested my coffee on the table in front of me, where my legs were currently propped up, my right leg crossed over my left.

I made a resolution for myself on New Year's. But I hadn't said it out loud to anyone yet.

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