New years

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Day four: New years expectations/jealous Josh.

Lots can happen on New years.
Truth.
Betrayal.
Kiss.
Love.

Thats what happened a lot. Weather its for the best or the worst. Well....we'll half to see.

     I couldn't stop think of Maya.
     Her hair.
     Her voice.
     Her tears.
     Her smile.
     The way it felt when she hugged me.
     The way her voice cracked when she spoke about her family.
     The way her eyes glittered speaking about art.
     The way we joked about the stupidest of things.
     The way she trusted me, and trusted me to not leave like her father.
      She was great.
      She was a great girl.
Kid.
     Shes a kid, Josh. She's fourteen. Your seventeen. Get that through you head!
     We were good friends. She had a thing with the cowboy. Lucas. She had a thing with Lucas.
     "Quit gritting your teeth. You'll ruin your mouth." My father snapped from the drivers seat.
     "Are you okay?" My mom turned around to face me. "You seem really angry."
      "Yeah. Yeah. I'm fine." I replied. Putting my ear buds in hoping to get lost in the music.
     My phone buzzed. Maya.

'You coming tonight?'
'Of course ;)'
'Can't wait.'
'Me neither.'
'Think Shawn will kiss my mom tonight?'
'I haven't seen them together, so I couldn't tell you my personal opinion. But Corey tells me a lot on the phone. Especially about Shawn.'
'He's apparently me.'
'Who?'
'Shawn. Your brother always tells Riles and I shes the Corey and I'm the Shawn.'
'Your not completely like Shawn.'
'Your right I don't have a beard ;)'
'Not just that. Theres a lot of differences.'
'Like what?'
'Well for one. His mom wasn't his real mom she and Chet (Shawn's dad) just made Shawn believe that.'
'Really? Wow that's rude.'
'Ik. And Shawn was really broken as a teen. Got into some bad stuff.'
'He did?'
'That's what he told me.'
'Wow.'
'Plus. Shawn's dad died....'
'Yeah. He told me about that one.'
'Okay.'
'Okay.'
'Don't do that.'
'Don't do what?'
'Quote bestselling books to me.'
'Ha.'
'I thought you didn't read.'
'Shhh don't tell your brother.'
'You can trust me.'
'I know.'

~

Arriving at the Matthews I was slightly nervous.
     I knew Corey and Topanga were having a lot of people over. Their friends. Riley's friends and us.
     I also knew what happened at midnight, and what couldn't happen.
     My mom and dad entered the apartment and greeted there family.  I entered last. Shaking of my coat and putting it on the hook I turned towards a running Auggie.
     "Uncle Josh!"
     "Auggie!" I grabbed him and hugged him. Resting him on my shoulders.
     "Uncle Josh!" Riley said ready for a hug, I brought Auggie down and he ran off. Giving a quick hug to Riley.
     "Wheres Maya?" I asked looking around.
     "Oh. She's talking to Lucas over there." Riley said pointing towards where Maya stood against the wall talking to a tall boy.
     "Oh."
     She twirled her hair slightly. Laughing at whatever Lucas had said.
     Then she saw me, eyes glinting. For a moment I thought she would leave the cowboy and come to hug me, but she turned her attention back to the cowboy.
      My smile fell, and then something slowly bubbled in my heart. Feeling like a volcano.
     Then he kissed her.
     And she kissed him back.
     I didn't realize Riley's sad eyes towards them, or the way it looked like her heart split in two.
     I just knew this ball of anger was forming in my gut and that ball of fire exploded.
     He held her waist tightly and she had her arms across his shoulders.
     The way he held her boiled my blood. Maya was delicate; strong, but gentle.
     The way he held her made me scared shed split in a million pieces. When, he should hold her like he wanted to put all those pieces back together. Not break her but fix her.
     They broke apart and Maya smiled at him, breaking my heart.
     She liked him.
     Why did that hurt so damn much?
     I turned around walking out over to where Auggie and Ava were arguing and spoke to them.

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