Home Bitter Sweet Home

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      For a moment the black space just holds me, I feel frozen,  stiff, my lungs still full of the liquid. For moments I float in the empty space, then sudden gravity pulls me down. With a shuddering gasp I feel cold sweat dribble down the side of my temples as my hair is plastered to my face. I cling to something, something soft and fabricated, I slowly open my eyes. Once they are barely open lights flash into my eyes, I squint to let them adjust, and slowly I begin to see a small room. Action figures standing idly on their shelves, a dresser with a world globe sitting on it, next to it sat a closet, barely creaked open to see clothes strewn about in there. God I hope the monkey isn't in there, I thought silently to myself.

     I wiped the sweat from my face and sighed in relief, its just my room. Then it hit me, the sweet smell of blueberry pancakes, I scrambled out of the covers out the door and ran down the hall into the kitchen. There she stood, the older woman of my sister, our mother. Her red curly hair tumbled down her back as she wore her favorite paint splattered apron. I looked over to the table to see Cassity, drawing in her coloring book with her array of colored pencils.

Our mother looked over her shoulder and said to her "Cassity can you go grab the syrup?"

"Yeah mom I got it," she got up and joyfully skipping over to the pantry.  She gently put the syrup on the table,she paused and looked up, her jade eyes locked into mine. She smiled and jumped into my arms hugging me tight as she giggled.

  Our mom looked over briefly before saying, "Oh hey baby, Happy Birthday. You lived to see another Birthday!" She looked back at her pancake making "How'd you sleep this time?"

  "I, uh, slept fine mum." I looked down at Cassity and she just gave me this worried look as if she knew I wasn't fine. She didn't look long at me with that look, she stopped and began to hide her face in my orange night shirt, I was surprised she didn't make fun of my Transformers pj bottoms.

Our mother looked over and smiled at me saying in a sweet voice, "that's amazing sweetie, I told you you'd grow out of them."

     She began putting pancakes on little silver plastic plates and flowed over to the table gently setting them down. I carried Cassity over to the table, putting her in her chair and gently pushing her in. I took my place beside her facing across our mum, I grabbed the butter and syrup and customized my blueberry pancakes. Once I took a bite I felt a smile creep across my face, mmmmm blueberry, nice fluffy blueberry pancakes, as I thought my silent praise for my mums cooking I shoved more in my face.

  Our mother pored orange juice in cups and gave us each a full glass, she smiled and held her cup up saying, "A birthday toast to my little eleven year Old-"

Cassity shot up and said, "wait we cant toast until daddy shows up, he said he'd be here!" Our mother went rigged, stiff, dead silent for one millisecond then recovered and smiled at her daughter.

  "My love your father isn't coming today he got busy at work last night." She said soothingly.

  Cassity did seem convinced as she insisted, "No i heard him come in last night you-"

  Her face darkened, "You were awake past your bed time and you were eavesdropping on conversations?"

Cassity's face paled, her lower lip trembled,"Y-yes mum i-i had a hard t-time sleeping a-and your         r-room is right n-next to mine a-and I...." she stumbled over her words as a tier slid from her eyes,          " Mommy you forgot to take your pills didn't you?"

Our mother scowled and said in a dark voice, "I've told you Cassity, that you don't eavesdrop on our conversations more than once! Go to my room and wait for me there."

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