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By the time we got to school today, everybody knew about second tryouts, and everybody wanted to watch.

The thing about second tryouts is it's a open event. Anybody can watch tryouts, but nobody really does because they have tryouts of their own.

Since this is a second tryout, nobody has anything going on, so it's basically like watching the guys go through a basic skill test.

The only people that ever go are the guys already on the team, their girlfriends, and a bunch of other girls.

Blake is getting looks all day. Blake has noticed me being more stand offish toward him and he has been apologizing non stop all day.

I keep lying and telling him I'm fine but he's not buying it.

The more time I have to think about it, the more I realize how bad that day could've gone.

With each minute I get more and more upset. I can't explain it, but I'm just beginning to feel flooded with emotions.

It's like all the fear I've been feeling and have tried so hard to push to the side is sneaking up on me. It's like the frustration that I'm not in control is suddenly hitting me all at once.

I can't remember the last time I had alone time, I can't remember the last time I was in control of myself, and I can't take it anymore.

Add to the picture everything I've been finding out these past few months? I'm a mess.

My parents might be kidnapped but alive, and I cant do shit about anything. I feel trapped within myself and it's suddenly starting to sink in.

By the time sixth period ends and I'm still not sure what's going on with my feelings, he pulls me aside and his eyes are full of something I can't quite figure out.

"Teal, I can't go through today anymore thinking you're mad at me." He says searching my face for any hint of genuine forgiveness.

I just look away from him. I don't know why my walls have gone up so much ever since the night of the party.

I've just been more defensive. Maybe it was a wake up call for me to snap out of my dream world where a hot FBI agent is protecting me.

The fact of the matter is I'm in danger, along with everyone I love.

Blake sighs and looks at me desperately. "Teal, please." His voice comes out weak. It throws me off guard and forces me to look him in the eye.

"I'm sorry for what I did that night. That's not me, and I promise I will never drink again. If I was thinking clearly I would never do that to you." He says placing a hand on my shoulder.

"But you did" I say sternly.

I hate how I can't stay mad at him. I hate how my body reacts to his touch. I hate what he does to me.

"Why did you leave? I want the truth." I say now, with tears in my eyes.

No. Hold that shit in, Teal. Don't cry.

Blake drops his gaze and looks at me desperately. "Teal... I don't know why I left... I don't know what I'm even feeling half the time." He stops and runs a hand through his hair.

"I don't know why but I can't function right if I know we aren't on good terms." He says searching my face.

"Bullshit. You know why you got drunk, you're just too afraid to tell me the real reason why." I say harshly as I look at him.

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