Chapter 15 - Dan

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The next night... in Dimsdale...

" I'd just like to congratulate Saul and Liam on becoming full members!" concluded Tag. There was a round of applause. I stood up and shook his thanks. I stepped up to the microphone and turned to face everyone else.

"Testing, testing, 123." I said. I then chucked it backward onto a pile of cushions. "Thank you Tag for those kind words in our honour," Saul  and Tag both smirked when I sarcastically said honour. "Well I have to say thanks for throwing us this party-"

"Man, this party blows!" interrupted Phil in the style of when Julian Smith once said it in a video. Phil was one of the three technicians in the base.

"Thanks for that input Phil, it's too true." I joked. Tumbleweed. "Mm, anyways, I just brains to say thanks." I concluded. Both Dan, Becca and Tag stopped smiling. Phil found it hilarious.

"What.. Did you just say?" inquired Tag.

"Um, I said 'I just wanted to say thanks.'" I frowned uncertainly at him.

"Right, sure..." he said. Awkwardly, I returned to my seat and Saul proceeded to make a speech that I'm pretty sure mentioned The Apprentice at one point. Heh, classic Saul.



Saul and Libby sat at opposite ends of the table. Saul was gazing wistfully off into space and Libby was gazing wistfully into Saul's eyes.

Either side of them, were a couple. Becca and Dan were making out to Saul's right and Helen and I were making out to Saul's left.

Both Saul and Libby broke out of their stupers when Saul produced an extremely awkward turtle that had the retarded twitching flipper things. Libby laughed slightly and Saul chuckled.

"Saul," said Libby. "I was wandering, since these guys are all... making out, if we-" she was interrupted by a beeping coming from Saul's watch.

"Oh, gotta go, I have advanced shooting practice now. See ya." he ran off out of the doors. Libby looked around at her surroundings.

"Well this sucks." she concluded.



Dan had just turned 4 a couple of months ago. It was mid summer and there was a blazing heat in the Arizona desert. His parents lived just about a kilometre from the edge of the desert, near Lake Tahoe.

Tahoe roughly translates as Lake, so the lake would be called Lake Lake. It's the 2nd biggest Lake in high altitude in the world. It's a pretty big lake. In six years, I would come to visit the lake, but that's not what this part of the story is about. It's about Dan's backstory, which without a doubt cannot possibly be good. Sorry to this who like feel-good films.

It was 8PM and Dan couldn't sleep. This was due to a mixture of intense summer heat coming from the desert and his parents screaming at each other.

He stumbled out of his bed. He pushed the door open and stepped through it. His parents shouting got louder. Hestarted to walk slowly along the corridoor to his parents bedroom door which was ajar, spilling light onto the carpet of the dark corridoor. He dragged his toy bear along with him in his left hand.

He got closer to the door. The shouting was seriously intense now. There was a loud bang, and then silence. Confused, Dan pushed open the door. What he saw from that point onwards would stay with him and haunt him forever.

What he saw was his father holding a pistol in his outstreched shaking hand and his mother lying dead n the floor with a bullet hole in her head. She was lying in a pool of blood and her dead eyes stared blissfully at Dan.

His father looked at the scene and a tear started to roll down his face. He turned to Dan and he knelt down to put a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry, son." he whispered, fighting back tears. He stood up and raised the gun to his own head. "I'm so sorry." he whispered as he pulled the trigger. He collapsed into a pool of his own blood.

"Daddy?" Dan whispered.



"Dad, I forgive you. I didn't want you to die." Tears rolled down his face ten years on. "I'm sorry dad." He raised the gun to his head. "I'm sorry."



I sat on my bed reading porn. Kidding, I don't read porn. I sat on my bed reading a Top Gear magazine when I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." I stated. Dan walked into the room. He stood awkwardly by the archway.

"Hey man, you got a moment?" he asked.

"One moment... wow, Volkswagen have gone to shit..." I muttered. I looked up at the awkwardly standing Dan. "OK, why?" I rebounded.

"Well I couldn't help but notice you said 'brains' yesterday." he said.

"I haven't gone crazy, so give me a damn break!" I shouted. He looked cowed.

"I'm not saying you have gone crazy, I just want to... 'test it out' I guess."

"Oh, OK." I said sheepishly.

"Well, if you'd like to follow me to the lab..."


"OK what you got for me then?" I asked.

"Well when we picked you lot up, we found an annoying group of zombies that weren't going down when they were shot. So we tried testing out a few new weapon prototypes on them, and we kept one in isolation. Basically, you need to try to speak to the zombie." Dan explained.

"I'm sorry, what the fuck?!? I need to speak to a zombie? Speak? Zombie? If I'm crazy then you certainly are too."

"Liam, the swearing is unnecessary. And it's just a test to see if it'll work."

"Fine." I sighed.

I walked towards an iron door and stepped through. Inside the room, half of it was sealed of by a clear wall with air holes. On one side, I was standing. On the other, so was a zombie. It was yelling 'BRAAIINS'. Type 1 zombie.

"Go ahead." came Dan's voice from a speakerphone. I stepped up to the clear partition.

"Um.. brains?" I inquired. The zombie stopped what it was doing and stayed silent. It stepped towards the partition and towards me. "Brains brains brains?" The zombie cocked it's head slightly. "Brains?"

The zombie roared out in rage at being mocked. It started banging the glass, while yelling 'brains' at the top of its lungs. It started cracking the glass.

"Oh, shit!!!" I cussed. "Dan, GETMETHEHELLOUTOFHERE!!!" I screamed. Dan pulled open the door.

"Out, quick!" he shouted. I ran through the door just as the glass shattered. Dan slammed the door and bolted it so that the zombie couldn't get out. He ran to the control room and came back out ten seconds later. "I gassed the zombie, so it's dead."

"Good." I said bitterly.

"Well that was a shite waste of money."


AT THE TIME OF THE EXPLOSION (mentioned earlier in the book)

"Dan stop it!!" yelled Helen.

"I'm trying, but the reactor's gone haywire!!" he yelled. "You're going to just have to survive the explosion." he concluded.

"Easy enough for you to say, you're not the one in here with all the dangerous chemicals and shit."

"Helen, you're going to make it through." he said. He smiled as he looked Helen in the eye through the glass partition. "I promise."

She paused. "OK. I believe you. But there's one thing I need to tell you before this blows anyway." she pleaded.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Dan, I love-" and then the reactor exploded.

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