Chapter 1

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A/N: Just to preface the story, all of this is (quite obviously) super duper fictional. Also, in this AU, Jimmy and Nancy are divorced - not because I don't like her, but actually because I do. They're a wonderful couple and I'd never want them to break up, but I'd rather write a story where they're not together as opposed to one where he's cheating on her. So yeah, this is absolutely nothing against the lovely Nancy! Also, just so you know, the picture attached is our main character Natasha (created with photoshop using several different pictures c:). Hope you enjoy the story, falpals!!

It's three o clock in the afternoon on a Wednesday, and I just kissed Jimmy Fallon in drag.

Is that a loaded sentence, or what?

I guess I've got some explaining to do.

It all started when we met. It was about a week ago, right after the Grammys. I'd been nominated for song of the year, but lost against Taylor Swift - which is totally fine since I ended up winning best breakout artist of the year. There were no hard feelings between us - we're pretty good buddies. She even invited me to the after-party at her place, and of course I couldn't refuse.

I bit my lip and shuffled around the crowded first floor, passing loads of dancing and chatty people socializing like pros. I, however, am awful at social interaction, and so I finally found an empty spot and plopped myself down on a comfortable vintage seat in the corner of the kitchen. It was mainly empty, besides Adele grabbing a glass of milk and Selena Gomez rummaging through the pantry for some cheez its. Once they left, however, I was alone.

And I liked it.

I fished my iPhone out of my bag and checked my various social media apps. Loads of people were congratulating me on my first award. I grinned and had the sudden urge to respond personally to each and every one of them, even though I knew it was an impossible feat. I was switching over to Instagram when the kitchen door swung open and he walked in.

I glanced up and did a double take. Freakin Jimmy Fallon. I was dead. I did my best not to stare and make a goofy face.

Too late - my fangirl smile was already present.

He opened the fridge and stared at the contents, humming along to the song booming outside the walls ("Can't Feel My Face" by The Weeknd). That's when I took a chance and did a thing I normally wouldn't do.

I spoke to a human.

"Whatcha looking for?"

He glanced back at me. "Oh, nothing - maybe just some cheesecake, I dunno..." He turned around fully, as though he had just registered the whole situation. "Heeeeeyyyy!" he said, as though we had known each other forever and weren't just meeting for the first time. "Congratulations on winning best breakout artist! Your music is awesome - it's just really great," he smiled at me - a big, perfect, Gatsby smile, and extended his hand. Ah, of course - this again - that inevitable inner battle of 'is this a handshake, a high-five, or something entirely different?' I went for the handshake and he laughed. "No, I'm helping you up, pal!"

I laughed. "Oh - how come?"

"So we can go dance."

My heart stopped. "D - dance?"

"Yeah," he smiled. "This is one of your all-time favorites, isn't it?" I tilted my head towards the door and realized "Just Like Heaven" by The Cure was playing. "Not to be creepy or anything!!" he added. "I just heard it in an interview."

He watches interviews with me? Of me? Where I am? I can't English?!?!

"No, no - it's not creepy!" I laughed. "Thanks for remembering. Uh...I'd love to dance."

"Fantastic! Let's go!" He grabbed my hand and tugged me out of the kitchen and into the crowds again, but this time I didn't feel so fearful. My #1 celebrity crush was whisking me through Taylor Swift's Grammys after-party so he could dance with me to one of my favorite songs. How could this get any better??

We found an empty spot and started to dance, shout-singing the lyrics as we went. He gave me a twirl a few times, which I really loved. The most wonderful part was that nobody even cared. Everyone else was so wrapped up in their own celebrity lives that they didn't give one lick of attention to us. Paparazzi would've freaked if they'd even caught one glimpse of us during that song. It was so much fun.

Once it ended, Jimmy collapsed onto a nearby couch, pulling me beside him in the process. "Man, that was great!" he panted.

"Yeah," I chuckled, "you've got some sweet moves, Fallon!"

"Thank you, thank you," he replied, waving in a mock bow. "Now, let's get down to business."

"To defeat the Huns?" I quipped. He did that thing where he laughs and ducks his head, punching the couch cushion. It took everything I had not to scream from sheer fandom.

He regained his composure and said, "No, I mean about having you on the show."

Whatwhatwhat.

"Oh my gosh, really?" I blurted.

"Yeah!" he laughed. "You're awesome! We've gotta have you on! Would you like to be a guest?"

"I'd love to!"

"Fantastic! This is pretty short notice, but the main guest we were supposed to have next Wednesday unfortunately had to cancel on us. Would you be willing to take her place?"

"Sure!" I replied, heart ready to fly out of my chest.

"Excellent," he said, pulling his iPhone from his snazzy suit jacket. "Lemme just make a note of it real quick..." he muttered. I sat in silence as he typed away, holding my breath to keep from freaking out. He locked his phone and slipped it back in his pocket. "Okay, all set! Let me explain the formalities and schedule and stuff real quick..." Jimmy went on to tell me what time I needed to be on set (9:00 am) and what time the show would wrap (3:00 pm) and what sorts of games we might play. I only heard about half of it because I was still so enthralled with what had just happened. It hadn't fully processed yet. It honestly still hasn't. "You cool with that?" he asked.

"Yeah, got it!" I replied, giving a little thumbs up.

"Great - I've been wanting to bring Ew back for so long. Nows my chance!"

"I can't wait! It's my favorite sketch."

"Me too!" he cried in his Sara voice.

"EW!" I shouted. I couldn't help myself.

"Oh my GROSS, you sound JUST LIKE MEH."

"DUH, Sara! We're BFFs."

"I KNOW."

We melted into more ridiculous laughter, but were interrupted as Jimmy's phone began to ring. He slipped it out and sighed. "I've gotta take this. Catch you later?"

I nodded. "Yup!" He smiled and left the room, probably searching for a more quiet place to talk. I couldn't get what the screen said out of my mind - Nancy. His ex-wife was phoning him. Why?

I tried to push it from my brain - every inch of thought about this guy beyond business or friendship. He's too old for you. He just got divorced a year ago. He's way out of your league. He probably already has a girlfriend. But I was hopeless. Even after the party died down and I went back to my apartment, I couldn't get the feeling of Jimmy's strong hands off of mine, or his sweet laugh out of my stubborn ears, or the scent of his gorgeous, evil cologne lingering everywhere I went. He just wouldn't leave me.

And I wasn't asking him to.

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