3.7

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FEBRUARY 7, 2015...


3.7; clearing up

♡ leila anderson. ♡ 

Maybe Matthew and I aren't meant to be. Maybe I wasn't the one who would 'change the bad boy', and that title was for another girl - someone who could actually maneuver Matthew from his label and actually change him for the better. 

I'm not even sure if the both of us are officially broken up. Although a part of me wishes that he would come back and fight for me, the other part of me wishes that he would just leave me alone - just so I could depend on time to heal me with no distractions, and I wouldn't have to get hurt over and over again. 

So anyways, it was Saturday, and to be honest (and for the very first time in my life), I wanted the weekend to go by quicker so I could go to school - just for the sakes of not having anything to do. Isabel had invited me to go hang out with her, but I told her that I wasn't in the mood. I was more in the mood of laying on my bed for the whole afternoon, cuddling with one of my pillows, trying to fall back sleep.

It was so damn hard. 

"Leila, sweetie?" I heard my mom's muffled voice from outside my bedroom door, followed by the door opening. 

"Yes, mom?" I groaned into my pillow, but it was loud enough that she could hear. 

"Um...someone's here to see you. Matthew." I tensed up at the sound of his name, but I didn't bother turning to look at my mom. 

"Don't let him in, mom. Just tell him I, like, died or something." I instruct, and it was quiet for a few seconds before my mom began to speak again. 

"Um, okay. I have to go, sweetie. Stay safe." 

"Yeah." I murmur and I heard my bedroom door close. I stayed still for a while, shutting my eyes tightly, hoping that it would help me fall asleep, but it was no luck. 

Suddenly, my bed dipped, and I felt arms wrap around my waist tightly and securely, and a familiar cologne whiffed in the air. I groaned in frustration and didn't bother to turn to him. "Matthew, leave." I say in all seriousness, as if he was going to listen. I should have known better; he didn't. 

"Hi, my little Leila." He whispered in my ear and placed a kiss on my cheek. "Are you still mad at me?" I gave him a grim look. "Okay, you are. Can I do anything to fix it?" 

I sighed and turned to face him finally, and he never let go of my body. "Well, you can start by opening up to me on what happened after school yesterday. What did you do?" Matthew stayed silent for a while, just looking into my eyes. "You don't have to answer that if you don't want to, Matthew. It's your choice. But if you don't...the door is right over there." 

I know I'm being a little bit harsh, but I needed to know what he did yesterday - and the more he kept it a secret, the more I became suspicious. What if he was cheating on me - and instead of going to the girl's house, they did it in the janitor's closet, or something? 

Matthew sighed and avoided my eyes. "I beat the shit out of someone." He mumbled nonchalantly and my eyes bulged. 

"What, why?" I raised my voice. 

"Because he kept telling me how you were going to break up with me, and that I was no good for you, and that he could do so much better as your boyfriend...and I got angry, so I beat him up." He clarified, still not looking into my eyes. 

Silence was shared between us for a while before I finally said, "You know who you should learn from? Ghandi." 

Matthew laughed, and his laugh brought a small smile on my face. Despite the situation of figuring out that Matthew beat some guy up, his laughter can lighten up anyone's mood in any situation. Just like now. 

"I missed you." He blurted and finally gazed into my eyes, leaning down so his forehead was rested on mine. "I missed you a lot."

"I missed you, too, Matthew...but I'm not even sure if we're together anymore." I tell him honestly. He frowned. "This keeps happening between us, and it's unhealthy. I'm convinced that another girl can do so much better than I can, to be honest."

"No, no, no, baby! Don't say that ever again. No. You're the only one for me." He declared. "Leila, I will try to change for you, okay? I promise that I'm going to treat you the way I think of you: the most important person in my life." 

"One last chance, Matthew. Mess this up, and I swear..." I paused and gave him a look instead. He grinned cutely and nodded. 

"My little Leila...I know that I'm not that ideal boy every girl wants to end up with - every girl's prince charming. And I know that I'm nowhere near perfect, although I try to be. But I have my mindset; and that mindset, is you. Keeping you. Being with you. Loving you." 

☆.。.:*☆


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