52. Thoughts

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It's been about 2 weeks since the elevator incident. We've stopped talking about that whole situation. The only people that do know, is the crew. It was the most terrifying experience of my young life. I'm struggling with nightmares about it.

I'm currently strolling around Madrid with Sammie. She's blabbing on about- wait... She's talking about our upcoming vacation. It's only a week long and she is complaining about it.

Anywho, since that traumatizing night, Scooter has been sent off the tour for a while. Justin changed his number again to escape the annoying ex. Za is still running from females. Sammie is bitching about him being a whore. I think she needs a second dose of Za to calm her nerves. Sammie has really been on edge lately.

When it comes to me and Justin, we have been constantly approached by the media about the elevator incident. He's talked about it, but hasn't given them the story that caused everything. The last thing I want is for that to slip out and our relationship crumble under the pressure of people assuming infidelity.

Me and Justin have grown closer. Near-death experiences do that to you. We have a great connection and amazing communication. Being able to tell someone anything that's on your mind without them judging or making fun of you is incredible.

I thought things like this were only in fairy tales or seen in movies, but it's my reality. I don't know where I would be without him. Dead, on drugs, homeless, who knows.

I'm a different person because of Justin. I'm confident, adventurous, loving, and extremely open-minded. I'll never take him for granted. He saved me from my destructive ways.

He thinks I give him too much credit, but I don't think I give him enough. I've never felt this way in my life. I can't put my feelings for him into words.

I found out a little secret Justin has. I don't get on twitter often, but I got on there yesterday and saw a tweet from him telling his fans to welcome me warmly. I'm apart of this family just as much as anyone else. That tweet made my heart melt and his true beliebers are very kind and welcoming.

Of course, there are people out there who would love to see this relationship fail, but I don't see that happening. Don't get me wrong, there are people out there who support us, but hate is everywhere.

"Marissa... MARISSA?" Sammie called. I jumped. 

"Were you listening to me?" My eyebrow rose. 

"AWH damn, Ri! What's going on with you today?" We sat on a bench.

"Um, Sam..." 


"Have you ever been in love?" 

"AWH shit!" 

"I'm being serious." I stopped her. 

"No, but I've loved someone before." 

"So have I, but I've never felt so connected to someone like I am to Justin. This feels new. This feels unexplainable." I looked at Sammie. "I feel like I'm under some kind of spell." I said. Sammie giggled. "I'm fo'real Sammie. Don't laugh at me. I've never been this happy before. Justin is everything to me." I looked ahead.

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Sammie scooted next to me. 

"I think I'm in love with Justin." I looked at her, then back ahead of me.

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