You Aren't Alone Just Know That I, Cant Save Our Heats Tonight.

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Hi guys, so I'venot been feeling all that great and the song choice was because I have been addicted to it and I love its chorus, it means so much to me, but you will find out the song later. If you're reading thr story then a big thanks goes out to you, and please leave your thoughts about it :3 That's allfor now, so bye then and I hope you enjoy the chapter, my little Batling Army:3

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Andy's P.O.V:

I couldn't believe my microphone died. Of all performances it had to be today that it decided to die. At first I was really nervous about having to share Ash' microphone but then it sank in and I felt at ease again, although, I did want to kiss him so badly, and when the crowd were chanting for us to I nearly took it up, but Ash seemed a bit more reserved than his usual shy self and I grew cautious. I was so certain that he wouldn't want me to have to share his microphone that it took me by surprise when he was nice about it.

I thanked the audience for coming out, and then walked off stage, waiting for the guys and Ash to follow. My heart pounding in my chest at the thought that Ash may not actually hate me, but who am I kidding? He doesn't love me either; I knew that when I ran from that wedding all hopes of being together again would crash and burn, but what was I supposed to do? I was told that the love of my life was cheating on me, I didn't know what to do. I was terrified and thought that it wouldn't matter because we had no chance of being together anyway. But I guess we did.

“We did well, guys!” CC screamed, Jesus, he is still loud. I would have thought that after five years of touring the world he would have quietened slightly.

“Aha, yeah, we did good, even with Andy's microphone breaking,” Ash's sweet voice commented, sending a sense of longing to pulse through my veins.

“Yeah... sorry about that...” I stammer, cursing myself for getting so damn nervous to speak to him.

“No, it was fine,” he replied, his mouth pricking up at the sides to create a small smile, but a smile nonetheless. He walked over to the other side of the room, getting a drink of water for himself, and I tracked his every move with my eyes, unable to think of anything other than how much I wanted him to be mine again. Wait.. was he still mine? We never officially broke it off... I don't know.

“Hey, Andy, mate, you're staring,” I just about heard Jinxx whisper, nudging me back into reality. My face turned a deep crimson red, and I directed my eyes to the floor. “Aha, we all know you love him still, there is no way either of you couldn't still be in love,” I knew he was right, but some part of my mind told me he wasn't. Ashley couldn't still love me after how I have treated him. I looked up, sighting the rest of the guys, each one holding a supportive and knowing look upon their face and in their eyes.

“Look, I saw the worry in Ashley's eyes on stage when we thought you hurt yourself, maybe he does care” Jake said, receiving a nudge in the ribs from Jinxx,

“Maybe? Can you not see how much he does care?” Jinxx hisses at Jake causing him to look away.

“Jinxx, it's fine, I think Jake is right,” I say, smiling to Jake who looks shyly at me for a moment before returning the gesture.

I stepped over next to Ash to get a drink of water,

“Are you ready?” he said, his eyes wide. I panicked for a few second, unsure of what he meant, but then realising that he meant the meet and greet we do after the shows. At the thought of doing a meet and greet my stomach twisted and I became light headed. “Err...Andy, you don't look too...” I ran from the room and into the bathroom where I proceeded to throw up the contents of my stomach. My eyes sting as they always do when I am sick, and I could faintly hear a light tread of footsteps coming closer as my guts contracted again, pushing any other treasures it had managed to cling on to up and into the toilet. My knees grew weak, and I cracked through them, falling to the floor. I could feel my blood draining from my face as a cold sweat set in. The bathroom door was swung open, but my vision was too blurring to see who it was that entered. I could hear them muttering something as my stomach contracted again, they must be talking to another person, I wasn't sure what they were saying but I could just about make out 'Tell Jon he can't go' and I guessed they were saying I wasn't to go to the meet and greet. A soft hand rubbed my back in soothing circles, as they held back my hair. I knelt there, retching into the toilet for what seemed like forever, as a foul taste lingered in my mouth and my eyes watered from being sick. My muscles in my sides and abdomen were crying out in pain as I went to stand up,

“No, stay here for a second... Stay still.”Ash's soft voice hushed me. Wait, Ash's soft voice. If I hadn't been feeling so sick and weak my heart would have done a flip, however, I still got those butterfly feelings that I always got when I'm with Ash, but this time they threatened to bring on another bout of sickness.

Ash sat with me for another ten excruciatingly painful minutes before Jon came to the door,

“Ash, we are going to need you for the meet and greet, we will get Colline to take him back to the bus,” he ordered, to which Ash answered with a few moments of silence as he continued to sooth my back before standing up and pacing over to Jon. As he left the door her turned back to me, whispering,

“Stay well until I get back, okay?” and then he left. The absence of his presence made me feel so alone and isolated. The room seems so vast and empty without him, and all I could do was sit on the floor, trying to keep down whatever is left within my stomach as I wait for Colline, my assistant.

It wasn't too long before she showed up, a look of worry fleeting across her delicate face.

“Jesus, Andy, we need to get you back to the bus, and if you are like this in the morning we need to get you to hospital!” she exclaimed, alarm evident in her voice. It took me a while, but I nodded weakly, and she helped me to my unsteady feet. Shaking like a leaf, I slowly made my way back to the bus. Ugh, I hate feeling weak like this; I feel so helpless. The light breeze cut through me like a knife, causing me to shiver and shake violently. By the time she got me to the bus I was extremely weak because of it all so she sat me down on the sofa, handing me a mug of hot chocolate and a piece of buttered bread. “This will help settle your stomach, dear” she said as I hesitantly took my first nibble of bread; the drink was far too hot for me to start sipping yet.

Never leaving my side, Colline made sure that I was okay and had everything I need; she was continuously fussing over me,

“Colline... c-could I get a p-pen and note pad?” I stutter, still feeling icy but now feeling a lot less sick. She bows her head and rushes off to fill my request, with a smile to spare. In the time it takes her to return I turned my thoughts to Ashley and how he was coping with the question he would be receiving at the meet and greet. Surely the fans would be asking him where I was and what was happening on stage, because to the audience it would have looked as though we were kissing...which would have been impossible to do and sing at the same time, but oh well. A slight smile made its way onto my lips as I thought about Ashley; he's the only one who could do whatever he wants but still seem as perfect and innocent as he was when I first met him at that party all those years ago. Scribbling my thoughts onto a piece of paper in hope to tidy them, I wrote: I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt you; I can't promise to take away all of your pain, but I can promise you that I will never let you face them alone. Another tear rolled down my cheek as I stared at the paper; it said everything I wanted to tell Ash, but these words are ones he could never see.

I went to stand up taking my notebook to bed so I could continue writing, but was crippled with an agonising lurch of my guts, once again, trying to force anything they could possibly hold up. I ran to the toilet, dropping my notebook, only to kneel in front if the toilet bowl for what seems like forever as nothing came up, but the retching refused to stop. Colline was stood my by side, soothing my back until finally I could move without the threat of retching. Despite not vomiting, I was still feeling extremely weak and shaky. Aided by Colline I shuffled my way to my bunk, where she tucked me in gently, treating me to a reassuring smile before she disappeared into the living room. I sat up slowly, grabbing my iPod, and plugging my headphones into my reddened ears. Young Blood Spills by Eyes Set To Kill came on, to which I softly sung along, thinking about every lyric and feeling their emotion.

Bruised by your love

Burned by your kiss

Is this true love?

Is this true love?

I wish Ashley could hear me now. One last tear slipped down my cheek as I sung that chorus, surely my love for Ashley is true, but could his love for me be too? For some reason I just felt as though our love had hurt each other so much that we just couldn't be sure if it was real anymore, but I knew deep down that if it wasn't true we wouldn't have worked through every single issue we have ever had. And even if Ash told me that he could no longer love me, that wouldn't make me stop loving him as a person, nor would it stop my desire to help him, so surely my love for him could only be completely and utterly real.

Just like my desire to help him.

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