Metal Gear Babby

Chapter 2: Geese Walker

The year is 1974.

Big Drake, "the war hero who killed Drake", also known as Baby,  turned off the ignition on his motorcycle. He put down the kickstand and walked toward the beach. He beat up his private army's soldiers and his bud Jimuhira Miller showed up. "Baby!" he shouted. "We've got guests."

They rode towards a shack. Inside were two people. Rick and Paz Minaj. Rick said the CIA had put some soldiers in his country and they were there to fuck shit up. Baby said he was a filthy beaner and that he wasn't gonna help him. Then Rick popped out a cassette tape and played it. On it, was Drake's voice. It was brand new. "Drake is alive?!" Baby thought to himself. He began to cry. Jim gave him his pacifier and he stopped crying. Baby then agreed to help.

He made his way through the Costa Rican jungle to some building. Inside was some bald dude yelling at a crip. The bald dude pushed the crip down the stairs and walked away. Baby went inside some big-ass place. Then, an AI tank indicated a boss battle. Baby probably could've done it without the crip's help but who am I, the author of this awful story, to judge?

Baby beat the hell out of that giant weapon with a rocket launcher. He then went up to confront the crip. His name was Hogh Emmerich. Hogh was a crippled man. He explained to Baby that he had helped develop that thing and that a bigger thing was capable of launching a nuke. Baby was still enticed about Drake, though. He strapped Hogh to a balloon and brought him back to his base in the middle of the ocean. He continued on his amazing journey.

Along the way he met some birdwatcher. She was the person who made the cassette tape in the first place. Baby was all like "uugu blab pup." The birdwatcher was older than the age of 1, though, so he spoke human language. "Where did you hear this?" He asked. She was a French chick so she replied "in lé big place right zere." He strapped her to a balloon as well and made his way to the big place with a keycard in hand to get in.

There, he heard his voice again. "I WAS RUNNIN' THROUGH THE SIX WITH MY WOES!" Baby teared up. He continued onward and saw a large machine. Drakes voice was coming from it. It was just an AI. He stood disappointedly until he heard the voice of a man that sounded like a 13 year old. His name was Dr. Kaleb Jonas. He wanted to carry on with Drake's music and ideas for music. He also helped make the bipedal weapons system "Geese Walker." Turns out it didn't launch nukes, though. It launched capsules containing a gas known as "WGEV". It would start something called the Wild Geese Epidemic. It would turn people into geese, but not any ordinary geese. Wild geese.

Baby said he'd stop him but he had to fight Geese Walker first. He did so and then beat up Kaleb Jonas. Kaleb Jonas felt no regret cuz it was pretty sick to make people wild geese. Baby took him back to his base. Back at Baby's base, Hogh was developing a bipedal weapons system called Metal Gear ZEKE. Paz Minaj took over it though and tried to kill Baby. That was her goal the entire time. Baby beat it up and threw her overboard. His eyepatch suddenly had a skull on it as he yelled "THARR SHE BLOWS!" Everyone was at peace. Also some kid was at the base named Toco.