Loving you, loving you leaves me hurt
All I do, all I do is get burnt
Loving you, loving you
I cannot be loving you, loving you...
Oh Wonder perfectly describes my every feeling as I sit on my couch with a tub of ice cream. Korey, who is currently sitting next to me, looks very concerned for my well being. He was supposed to come over after dinner to see how everything went, to see how the happy couple was doing. Instead he came over to find me sitting on my couch, sobbing. He has no idea why, but I'm sure he's guessed. I can feel the outline of the velvet rectangle in my pocket, in it a dark grey band with 'Love' engraved on it, to match the promise ring. Tonight was supposed to be the night. Two years, a promise ring, a real ring...
I felt like I was drowning, Troye was my happiness, now he's Connors. I don't know how I could be so stupid, so dumb. How did I not notice how distant he had been, how he seemed so far away from me at all times. From the age of four I had planned out my dream wedding, from the sunflowers on the tables to the topper on the cake. I thought I would finally get to live my dream of being married to someone who makes me the happiest person in the world. Instead I was sitting on my couch sobbing into a container of mint chocolate chip ice cream, looking at the colors of Grace and Frankie blurred on the TV, salt water pooling in the corners of my eyes. I set the ice cream on the table and rested my head on Koreys lap. He wiped the tears from my eyes and ran one hand through my hair, using his free hand to flip through the channels until finally landing on my favorite movie- Bride Wars. The rest of the night was spent in silence, the only noise coming from the television and occasional laugh from Korey.
The guilt knotted my stomach until it was an unsolvable maze. I felt so bad for hurting Tyler the way I did, but the truth of the matter is I was in love with Connor, Tyler still made me happy, but only in a friend way. I walked to my car and turned it on, sitting in silence for a moment before putting it in drive and exiting the parking lot. I didn't know where to go, I sure as hell wasn't going to Tylers, and I couldn't bear to go to Connors, so I went to the only place I knew, Ricky Dillon's apartment. Since Ricky had been in O2L with Connor, he was one of the few people who knew about our relationship and my plan to break up with Tyler tonight.
As I arrived at his door, I wasn't sure if this was the best idea. Ricky was nice and all, but I wasn't sure how understanding he would be about it. It was too late now, so I built up the courage to knock on the door, and as I was about to bang my fist against it, none other than Ricky showed up. "Troye? What are you doing here?" he asked me, confusion in his voice.
"Ricky, I really screwed Tyler over tonight." I was able to get out, before choking back a sob.
"Oh Troye, I'm so sorry," he said, looking at me with sympathy. I didn't deserve to be looked at with sympathy, I was a monster.
"I just got stuff to make dinner, I only got enough for one, but you're welcome to join me and raid my fridge if you want."
"Sure, thanks Rick pickle," I said with a weak smile, before following him into his apartment.
*AN* Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated in a while. I deleted Wattpad on my phone to make room for the new update and never got it again. Sorry this chapter is so short, I'm not the greatest at writing long chapters. Also sorry for the fact that there's no tronnor in this chapter, once again. I promise there will be some next chapter and I'll try to update sooner, no promises with school haha.
Troyler- a ship from 2014. a horrible time that left two people heartbroken and sad. Tronnor- a ship for 2015. a good time leaving two people happy and in love. there's only one problem. one person is still heartbroken and sad.