How did we end up like that?

That night I slept with my pillow wet and my cheeks stained from my tears. How did I end up like that? This is why I didn't want to fall in love. Nights filled with tears and heart aches, days filled with daydreams and smiles, love is a messed up thing yet everyone wants to fall into its trap. Bullshit.

Love is good and evil mixed up together. It's day and night, darkness and light. You have to find a way to live within both sides of love and I couldn't but I wanted to. I wanted to find a love without rough paths but I didn't realise that what I was asking was impossible. Especially in the world we live. A fucked up world filled with madness and darkness, that's what's going on and it's not easy to change it ... its actually almost impossible.

So, how can you find true love without complications in such an awful world? You can't. You have to learn to be a warrior and fight for what you believe and want ... As long as it's the right thing and you don't hurt others. I never hurted anyone with my relationships, I fought for them yet they always end up the same way. I used to think that I didn't fight enough, that's why they didn't last. After a long time I thought that they didn't last because non of those guys where the one for me ... Now, I'm not so sure which of these two are or if there's another reason.

So, I came into a conclusion. My relationship with Andrian would be completely business related. We didn't make a good couple but we did work well together. It wouldn't be easy -actually it would be the hardest thing I've ever done- but it was the right thing for both of our shakes.

This morning, would be the hardest of my entire life but I didn't know that until Andrian asked some of the employees for a meeting, me as well. Amanda was there to hold my hand as I entered the destroyed office of his that no one had bother to tidy. Papers all around the room, broken stuff, including the huge window that I hadn't notice the night before.

The only thing that changed in the room was the huge black table in the center and people sitting around it and I quickly recognised Chloe, Theresa and Taylor. Andrian was standing on his feet when he noticed me and my head fall. When I sat down on one of the four available chairs, I allowed my gaze to scan him. Tired eyes, pale skin and messy hair. His suit was messy and his tie was a little loose. He was a mess, an utter one and I cought my heart to ache.

Two more people walked inside the room, one of them being the man in the suit I had see in the elevator a few days back. He was wearing grey dress pants and blazer and a white shirt. He took a seat besides me and put his briefcase on the wooden table. Andrian cleaned his throat, meaning that the meeting had started.

" As you know, last night there was a burglary in the publishing. Now, the burglars didn't manage to get anything but due to the fight that took place here, a lot of valuable stuff were broken along with many of our computers and files were ripped and destroyed. Because of that event, we need to fix, repair and buy everything before we attempt to do a deal of any kind. That means that the trip to New York is canceled. I have already talked to Mr. Green and we have agreed to reschedule our meeting for when we will be able to go there. " He said and paused for a moment. I looked around the room, only to see silent co-workers, looking at each other, communicating silently. It was obvious that they didn't like his idea.

" I know a few of you are thinking that the deal will bring in a lot of money for the publishing and it's repairing but it's not that simple. We need to have files that we don't at the moment because they are either destroyed or thrown down in every corner of the publishing in every floor, even the roof. We need to recollect the files that we have and find those that were lost. For that we need our computers and most of them are badly got damaged. You obviously know that, I gather you here, not to tell you things you already know. No, I gathered you here because I believe in you, all of you ... " He said and I felt his eyes on me.

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