Ch.1

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**All ideas in this story are 100% mine. I have worked so hard on this and I hope you all enjoy it. This story is copyrighted so PLEASE DO NOT STEAL IT IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM. Thank you :) **

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There I was, sitting in my loitering car, as huge drops of rain pelleted at the exterior. My old Toyota was parked in the middle of the abandoned parking lot, but I didn't have the strength to get out. Instead, I stared down at the deteriorated journal in my hands, the blue cover partially torn off. The condition was quite plausible, considering what the book had been through. Because it was my only companion for so long, I learned to take it everywhere. Light purple nail polish was smudged in the corner, as the surface was a very handy layout for painting my nails. The majority of the pages were stained with water, having taken a bath or two with me. A big red ketchup stain was lingering on the spine, and the entire journal was dotted in dried up tears. 

Once I was finished inspecting it, I took a deep breath before flipping it open. The first page was covered in my neat handwriting, still crisp from a year ago. I decided that before I got out of the car, I would read the whole book. 

I knew I was just buying time, but at that moment, time was what I really needed. 

My hand fumbled at the side of my seat until I found the lever that pushed the cushion back, attempting to get myself a bit more comfortable. For a while, all I did was stare at the words; I was too scared to read it. I didn't want to have all those memories come back. I didn't want to feel all those previous feelings. I didn't want to think about something I was trying so hard to forget.

A thin sheet of sweat covered my frantic body as I sat there, not knowing what to do. Deep breathes left my mouth-uneven and hurried. My hands trembled as they pulled my hair into a ponytail while I begged myself to calm down. All I wanted was to forget everything. To make all of the emotion that I was feeling go away. To go back in time and fix everything. 

I sat there, my eyes glazed over, wishing everything would get better. I had never felt anything close to the pain that was drumming so hard in my gut, and I couldn't handle it anymore. I wanted everything to end.

After a few long minutes of strained breathes and anxious fingers, I finally managed to calm down, at least for the moment. My eyes slowly glanced at the words inscribed on the page, trying to avoid them, but having no such luck. I forced myself to process the lines, and not stopping until I had read each and every single one.

Taking one last gulp-which was extremely hard considering how tightly my throat was clenched-I began to read, letting all the memories uncoil around me, along with all the happiness, pain, sadness, and lots of love.

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**So this is the first chapter, what'd you think? Can you guess what the story is about? This was just the prologue; the next chapter will really start the story. Give me your feedback!

Read my other three FINISHED stories, "The Step-Brother" "The Teacher" and "The Boy That Saved My Life".

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I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH AND I REALLY REALLY HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS STORY BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON IT FOR SO LONG. I know it is different, but please give it a chance!

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