Reasons to Hate the Commute

#542 Plants are such ***holes ~ signora.santibanez

The plants along the Cubao underpass are dicks.

I only noticed this when I rode one of the few buses that actually go by there, perhaps from the outdated view that taking the underpass is faster.

Truth is, I wasn't in a hurry to get to where I was going. So I thought I'd take the "scenic route" – the buses that go through all the tight spots along EDSA for no good reason.

But the Cubao underpass is generally regarded as a nice place to get stuck in traffic in. It's like being in a greenhouse. You're enclosed in simulated sunlight and colorful exotic plants - plants that were placed in pots along the walls by the Luntiang Sinauna Society (as the huge sign spelled out in multicolored moss says before you enter).

Mostly the plants sit still. But we all know that sometimes they make weird movements – that's to be expected. Cleaning the air in the metropolis is a tough job, and sometimes you have to act a little crazy.

So then I noticed this one little plant making repetitive motions with its leaves, which resembled really long, slender human fingers. I was bored, so I paid closer attention.

The little plant was signing G-A-G-O repeatedly. And nobody else on the bus noticed!

Maybe it was because no one else on the bus was hearing-impaired and lacking the proper implants. Or people were just too absorbed in their little distractions to notice.

In any case, it was up to me to play the hero.

G-A-G-O K-A R-I-N, I signed back.

The plant stopped moving, then started to tremble. It resembled a person who was either looking as scandalized as I felt when I noticed it, or else was shaking with laughter.

M-A-S G-A-G-O K-A, it signed. Then made the shape of a raised middle finger.

I wasn't going to be outdone. I signed an "up yours" and it signed G-A-G-O G-A-G-O G-A-G-O furiously as my bus rolled past it.

I don't think it was able to replicate my follow-up obscenity because of lack of, you know, arms. So, I think I won?