Chapter 19

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Dedicated to @_hanaD_ because thats the first time I've been begged for an update.

When Niall woke again, the Windows were dark, and the car silent. Liam was staring straight ahead at the road. He could vaguely remember waking up once, but he didn't remember if anything eventful had happened. He sat up in his seat, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Are we almost there?" He asked, his voice still full of sleep. You could hear the tint of the Irish accent from when he was young in his voice much more clearly than when he spoke normally, and Liam felt his heart flip at the sound.

"Just a couple more hours." Liam promised Niall. He watched as the blinde boy ran a hand throigh his hair, hoping that he had been a sleep when Liam had touched those same strands. As Niall processed the words, his mouth curled into a little frown.

"Are you sure you should be driving in the dark like this?" He pointed out. Liam shrugged. He knew that he probably shouldn't be, especially after getting the worst night of sleep in his life. He was Exahsted and practically falling asleep on the road, and he knew it wasn't safe to continue like that. The only reason he was still driving was that he was scared That waking Niall up too soon after the incident earlier would have made the boy remember what had happened.

"I'll be okay."He assured Niall, even though the words that slipped past his lips were a blatant lie. He knew that he couldn't drive much longer, but he didn't want Niall to worry about him. This trip was all about Niall.

There was a tense silence for several seconds, and Liam felt his eyelids drooping. He focused on the road in front of him, trying not to be distracted by Nialls unbroken gaze on his face.

"Do you know how many times I've said that exact same thing?" Niall asked, his voice soft and cracking half way through his sentence. Liam could tell that Niall was about to cry. He pulled the car over to the side of the road. Niall was a priority.

"I'm sorry Niall." He said. He knew it wouldn't help. Niall needed to let out his emotions, and that was okay. In fact, that was more than okay. If Niall could release his emotions in ways other than cutting, that was a good thing.

Niall wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his hoodie, sniffling once. "No, it's okay Liam. You don't have to stop driving."

Liam could tell somwthing was bothering Niall, and he needed to know what it was. He lifted his arm rest and scooted a little closer to Niall so that the sides of their bodies were touching slightly.

"What's wrong Niall?" He asked, wrapping his arms around the smaller boys shoulders. Niall instinctively leaned into his embrace.

"I'm just so sick of all the lies." Nialls voice was strained, on the edge of tears. It hurt Liam to hear. "I'm tired of lying, I'm tired of being lied to. Im so sick of it all Liam, and I just don't know if I want to even try anymkre."

"What are you saying Niall?" Liam asked, terror in his voice. He hoped and prayed and begged to any one that was listening that Niall didn't mean what he thought Niall meant.

Niall didn't say a word.

Liams heart sank. "Niall, don't think like that, please. You mean so much to me, I couldnt bear it if you were gone."

"I want to believe that Liam. Really, I do. But you hardly know me, and lying is just so easy." Niall wasn't crying. He was out of tears. He needed blood, He needed pain, He needed the sting of the metal kissing his skin. He didn't know if he really wanted to be gone, But he knew that it would be easier. And he was putting so Many people through so much pain. Maybe he should jist leave.

"I wouldn't lie to you Niall. And I'm not the only one who would be devastated. Think about Louis." It hurt Liam that Niall didn't trust him and he didn't like using Louis as an example, but he knew that Niall trusted Louis. He wished Niall would trust him like that.

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