ASHWOOD ACADEMY

Chapter 8: TENSION

There were no more extra-curricular activities for what was left of the students in the circle. Kensington had put them on a strict schedule, for their own safety.

The campus police knew where each of the three colored students were supposed to be at all times.

It had worked.

The bigots had learned that they simply wouldn't be afforded the opportunity to do anything to the colored students.

On the downside, the only time Nathan had protection was when his schedule matched theirs.

Anita pleaded his case with Kensington, but on this, she would not bend.

Every minute he was away from her, she was needled with worry. It had begun to effect her work.

~~~

Anita recited a poem she had written for an oratory class. It was as personal as the assignment had called for, all about her hopes, dreams, failings, and love.

After she was done, the professor, began to ask her probing questions, he had not for anyone else.

She felt intruded upon.

So, she asked very personal questions back, visibly, upset.

What she hadn't known was that the reason he had asked her those questions, was to try to better understand the motivations behind what he'd seen as a phenomenal poem.

~~~

The group sat in the library for their usual study session.

"I heard you lost it in class, yesterday.  Nita, what happened?" Nathan asked.

"You know that I've been stressed." she said. "With Jazz and Thomas gone, it's been difficult."

"It's been rough going on all of us, Nita." Janine said. "-But we'll get through."

She nodded, looking up at Nathan, who looked worried.

"I'm fine, Nate." Anita assured.

He didn't look convinced.

Fred looked over at Janine. "Uh, Janine... Why don't we go for a walk around campus.  And before you start Anita, there are two security men, one of them can act as an escort."

Nathan watched them go.

"Now, what's really wrong, Anita?"

"I don't know if I can deal with this anymore." she said, an edge of panic in her voice. "Thomas and Jazz are gone and you don't have protection, Nathan."

"Yes, I do."

"-When you're with me or us. But most of the time, you're on your own."

"-As I was at the beginning of this." 

"-It's different now, Nathan!" she interrupted, frustrated.

"Every minute you're away, I think something horrible may be happening to you. ...I'm frightened for you.  You're seen a traitor for being friends with us, a 'nigger-lover'.  Your whiteness won't protect you, anymore."

"You've always had a good imagination Nita, it helps your writing, but you need to put it aside when comes to me."

He reached across the table and picked up both of her hands. "I promise, I'll be alright."

"No.  -You can't keep that promise.  It's out of your hands!" she said frowning, her voice low and full of tears. 

"Maybe... you should break-up with me-"

"-No!"

"That's not an option, Nita.  I won't do that. I won't let those hate-filled jerks force us apart." he said, seriously.

She shook her head helplessly.  "...What can we do?!"

He got up and walked around the table. "Take my hand."

After she did, he pulled her out of her chair and dragged her through the many aisles and rows of books.  He moved with a purpose, knowing where he was going.

"Nate- Whut..."

When they rounded the last corner,  he kissed her.

"We can live, Nita. We can love. Savor every good moment. I can tell you, every moments I'm around you is a good one."

She gave him a soft gaze and returned his kiss. There was mix of want longing and the note of  a dare in their eyes.  He paused, putting a finger to her lips.

She nodded her head, understanding.

They kissed again, more urgently this time.

Nita guided his hands to her skirt.  He pulled away slightly giving her a questioning look, as he hadn't intended this to go this far, but she insisted, guiding his hands.

"I need this. -I need you." she whispered against his lips.  "I know it's not ideal, but I'm falling apart...I want to feel you - us together." 

His heart lurched, a heady mix of emotions tumbling through him. The wrongness of this, and the rightness of it.  It felt like they were meant to be.  Like everything else in the world melted away.  There was nothing but her.  And she was everything. 

He slowly nodded.  He could deny her nothing.

The sounds of shifting bodies and rustling clothes echoed in the silent library, the fear of being discovered driving this interlude to further urgency.

He held her gently as he pressed swift open-mouth kisses against her neck.  

She bit her lip to keep a strained sounds from escaping as his hands wrapped around her waist, kept her steady.

This was not the love-making session either had imagined. This was urgent, quick, and hushed.

As he built up an awkward rhythm, the slow press and give, melted into something else.

A tiny gasp escaped from her lips and she held his face meeting his eyes as they moved. Needing the connection, the reminder that they were still here,  that this thing they had was greater than the pain, terrible forces around them, and it was.

His breath was coming in hot drafts against her mouth.

She lifted her leg around his waist for leverage and he moved to place that made her tremble and strain.

....Another small gasp and they were through.

~~~

He held her for a moment, neither one of them wanting to let go, but they did. They had to.

Anita leaned against the wall, catching her breath... She moved on unsteady legs to the nearby restroom and cleaned up.  Nathan, followed her and entered the adjacent single stall for men and did the same.

Three minutes later she emerged, nervously smoothing her her shirt. Now that she was sobering up... she inwardly chastised herself, but she couldn't bring herself to regret the act. The circumstance, yes.  Intellectually, she knew it had been risky and foolhardy.  But she also couldn't deny that she needed it. She needed him close.  She needed that mini-reset as their hearts bled into one.

Nathan adjusted his clothes as well...Anita stood up on still shaky legs, self-consciously checking everything with her hands.

Nathan took them in his own and kissed them.

"You look fine,"  he whispered.

"You too," she replied, and met his eyes with a small smile.

He lead her back through the stacks, to the table, where Fred and Janine were reading their books.

They didn't look up.

Anita and Nathan sat down, only pretending to study for the rest of the hour, their thoughts drifting back to those fleeting minutes.

It had worked....

She stopped worrying...at least about that.

At least for a time.