Silence Killed Us [Poem]
The many ways we’d speak throughout everyday of the week,
Constantly replays in my head.
I can’t focus, I can’t sleep,
So my heartbeat I listen to instead.
You tell me I’ll eventually understand how you are,
But how can I do that when you’re so close, yet still seem so far?
I try not to come off clingy, needy, or whiny,
So I decide to keep quiet throughout your days of lying…
Lying…in your bed, eyes closed as if sleeping,
Thinking the thoughts that I long to hear, but you bite your tongue to keep me…
Out….I feel like you shut me out,
Slammed the door in my face, as if in me, you saw doubt.
I was nothing but honest with you, my feelings, I always share,
But for some apparent reason, this week, you didn’t care.
You’d shut your mouth, closing off any means of reason,
Leaving me alone, feeling useless, like weather with no season.
Again, I tell you “I hate this, I hate that we’re barely talking”,
You’d retort “Oh”…again…barely talking.
I decide to follow in your lead and rarely speak your way,
That’s when you find the need to say that I’m pushing myself away.
I’m not trying to push myself away from you,
If anything, to you I plead and shout.
How do you expect me to hold on,
When you’re hand isn't reaching out?
I find myself growing irritated by the day,
My stress digging deeper as I feel my happiness decay.
You keep yourself distant,
Keeping your thoughts bundled up.
Who knows why,
I guess maybe distrust…
All I know is…
….the silence killed us.