Chasing Stars {Ereri/Riren}

25. Skip

video: Shingeki no Kyojin AMV- Wrath of the Titans by TheBakaanimationz

not ereri but a divine snk amv i highly recommend you watch it. i saw it on tumblr a few months ago and it is utterly fantastic.

about my one month hiatus. a lot of you aren't following me, so you haven't seen my message board. i have been bombarded with writer's block since, idk, may or june. its not getting any better, so im going to have to force myself to write again. alas, this shitty chapter :/

also- this book is coming to a close. three or four more chapters, i think? i'll save all my comments for the end.

~~~

"Where's your sister?" Petra asked as I sat wearily on the stool. Hanji raised an eyebrow, filling a glass nearby. I explained Mikasa's job and Indianapolis.

Today was Friday. It had only been five days since I began reliving my torment. Or, maybe I should word it like, I've relived my torment for five days now. Why had I continued the story again? I needed to finish it soon, if not tonight. This was exhausting.

"Let's skip about four months," I added hastily. "We've got no need to go in tiny details. This watch-" I gestured to my arm- "was a gift from him on Christmas. Now, in March, on the 30th, things get interesting..."

~~~

I groaned. "Good thing all of our papers are filled for graduation." Levi hummed with indifference. It was Wednesday, but the rest of the week was off in preparation for the ceremony. "Oh," I mumbled. "You never told me what your studies were."

"Criminology." He almost looked distracted. Normal enough, had he not been staring at a wall.

I cocked my head, and then brightened. Smiling, I reached over the pillow separating us, to jiggle his arm. "So is Mikasa's! Isn't that cool?"

"We had classes together," Levi responded dryly.

My shoulders slumped. I leaned back into my couch. It truly is boring in an apartment without a TV or newer electronics. All I had was a blocky thing that called people when it felt like it. "What's up?"

"Not me."

It took me a moment.

I slapped a hand over my mouth, but it was too late to stop the giggling. "Was- was that a joke?" I questioned incredulously. The raven sent me a side look, red lips twitching. I smiled, leaning forward once again. "Alright, now. What's wrong?"

Levi's attempt at a grin crumpled. "Nothing. What were your studies?"

"Art." I shrugged. "Vague and general, I know. But just in case, you know? My mom used to tell me all the time how happy my art made her. They were shit art, right? I was like seven at the time. If only I could improve and make her even more happy, you know? I'd rather make her happy than work for a job I didn't-"

"Eren, marry me."

I blinked, still smiling softly. I blinked again. "Huh?"

Levi pulled his legs up under him and scooted around until he was facing me completely. He lifted both hands and cupped my cheeks. His hands were cold. Flat, blue eyes stared intently. "Marry me."

I watched his lips move mutely. My palms pressed against the pillow, still holding me up on hands and knees. A lump slammed into my throat. "M-m-"

"Dammit, Eren!" Levi growled. Now his eyes weren't flat as much as they were widened. Instead of thin eyebrows creasing together to form wrinkles in between, they slanted downwards. The hands holding me shook slightly.

And then it hit. Marry me. What was marriage? White dresses, big cake, and babies everywhere, right? Oh, we were guys. Wait- marriage? Marriage? What was my name again-?

The lump in my throat intensified, and the pain sparked tears. I sniffed. "Marr...iage?"

Levi huffed, looking away. I saw an ear, bright red. "Yes," he muttered, dropping his arms numbly.

"Marriage," I repeated dumbly. My eyes couldn't focus on anything.

"Yes! Just- stop saying that word. Please." Slowly, he turned his head around, brows creasing from an emotion other than irritation. Levi bit his lip, cheekbones flushed. I'd never seen him in such disarray before. The man said, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh," I whispered, touching my cheek. That explained my eyes not focusing. I brushed the bottoms of my palms over my cheeks, to no avail. They kept coming. "Damn," I chuckled. My eyes met his. "You can't marry me," I sobbed.

Levi eyed me in alarm. "Why?"

"Well- because- I'll never be as good as you. You're beautiful, a-and strong, and you don't get emotional. I can't possibly combat that. I love you- I do! And- nobody sees what I see. But I don't deserve you. With you, I feel like I'm just chasing stars."

Confusion. A shaky breath. Then: "Chasing stars?"

"You're too far away for me to get close. I'm a cocky asshole. I'm average. I'm out of your league."

Down, down, went the eyebrows. Levi's lips pursed. His gaze darkened. "How unpleasant. Did you ever think that maybe I wanted this? Why the hell do you think I proposed?"

I peered down with wide eyes. Levi snaked his arms around my neck and pulled me close. "Eren," he breathed, curling his fingers into my hair. He pushed his head into the crook of my neck. "Eren, you shitty brat. Just marry me."

My lips upturned. I closed my eyes. Levi, you bastard. "Okay."

Something cool slipped down my finger. A silver band. "Happy birthday."

Indeed.