December 10th

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*flashback begins* (The day of the accident)
"Jongdae ssi, you want me to make coffee?" I asked. It was a beautiful morning at the empty dorm. Everyone went off to do something so it was just me and Chen. He nodded happily, "Yes, Minseok hyung." I was in a happy mood because tonight, I was going to propose to my girlfriend that I've been dating for half a year now since Exo disbanded. Chen was excited and happy for me as well and was joking the whole time last night. "Yo, Minseok hyung, you better be posting that on Instagram tonight." He joked. I laughed, "let's see what my mood is tonight."

I ordered more and more beer. I kept drinking until the bar closed. I tumbled out and started throwing the bottles at the street. "WHY DID THIS HAPPEN??" I screamed. I kicked the wall and fell on my knees. The girl... She cheated on me and dumped me... All this time, she wanted fame... Not love... I started to cry. I barely cried, all this time... But this time, everything emotion poured into me. Suddenly, I felt someone help me up and wipe my tears... Chen. I pulled away from him, "Leave me! I need some time alone." "Hyung, I can't see you like this. I hate seeing you hurt." Chen said and grabbed my hand. "I SAID STOP BOTHERING ME!! I NEED SOME TIME ALONE!" I pulled away from him and prepared to ram into a wall. Chen grabbed me and locked me in place, "Dying isn't gonna solve anything!! What you need right now is someone to care about you!" "NO ONE CARES ABOUT ME!" I screamed and struggled violently to break free. "I CARE about you!" Chen said and hugged me tightly. I pulled away from him and said, "If you do CARE about me, then LEAVE me ALONE!" He wanted to come over again so, I pushed him forcefully. He tumbled towards the street and suddenly.... In a blink of an eye... I stood there. I didn't move. My mind went blank...

I sat there... on a chair... looking at the door and my hands which were shaking violently. I didn't feel anything, nothing. All I see... was blood on my hands... The M members came rushing in asking what happened. I didn't say anything... I felt no words, no feelings, no thoughts, nothing. Luhan took my hand and squeezed it but said nothing. The whole world felt like it was closing on me... It was hard to breathe.

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