Today was kind of a gloomy day for some reason and I decided to go to Finn's place. But something was odd. As I came nearer to their large treehouse, I can see through the window that he's crying. I wonder what it is? I know he wouldn't mind though, I'm a friend afterall. Well, a part of me regrets saying that.
It was raining hard.I don't even know what i'm doing right now.I don't know why i'm heading to Finn's house despite of feeling lonely. Maybe to accompany him? I took no time of thinking more negative outcomes and floated right away in front of their house, wearily knocking at the door. I feel like I'm going to catch a cold soon. My body's shivering.
It took seconds before the door swung open. Just then I saw the man I loved standing there,opening the it for me. It's obvious that he wiped his tears away before coming to get the door. His eyes are puffy and red.
"Finn...." I said in a worried tone.
"M-marceline? What are you doing here?" He seemed kind of surprised from my sudden appearance. Well, I cannot blame him from not expecting me to come at times like these.
I didn't bother to answer his question, instead... I entered his house without consent nor sign. I sat on the couch, still focusing my eyes on Finn.
"Hey Marceline, what happened to you?" He asked, closing the door. Maybe he was bothered by the fact that I let myself get this wet under the rain... I don't usually do that.
I noticed that there is a picture frame of PB, not to far from where I was. I decided to go near it and hold it in my hands.
"Oh, uhm.... Let me take care of that, I just m-misplaced it." He suddenly snatched the frame away from me and hold it to his arms, as if it was some kind of a must protected item. I knew it already.He's crying because of PB.
"Finn, are you stupid?" That question was kind of unexpected.What I mean is, it just suddenly came out of my mouth. I cannot endure my feelings anymore.
"Wh-what? What are you saying?" He exclaimed. It seems like he was kind of shocked and pissed at the same time.
"You know what, you're still stupid getting your hopes up for PB to love you back! You're just a kid anyway!" I yelled at him. Jake isn't here, so there'll be no commotion to be started.
"You.... You don't know how it feels like." He said in a low tone, lowering his head down. Tears started to form in the corner of his eyes.
"Finn... I'm-" Me, myself didn't meant to say those words to him. I know he needs comfort, but me as well.
"Of course you'll never know!" He yelled back, turning his back at me while hugging the frame to his chest. Just seeing him like this feels worse in my case.
"Finn... Of course I do...." I said in a low and cold voice. Maybe it's the time already he'll know about it.
"What?" He tilted his head back to me.
"Finn... Will you tell me what happened?" I wanted to comfort him right now, in a right way. In a way that he'll learn his mistake of crying over PB.
"I... I confessed to her. But... She rejected me again. I knew it. I knew it! Yes i'm stupid enough for saying those things to her even if I already knew that she will reject me again. Is it because I'm too young? Is it because she thinks that I'm just some brat who knows nothing about love? She'll never love me the way I do. She will never ... Never..."
I embraced him with my arms, halting him from continuing his sentence and hurting himself once more. I can't stand to see him cry like this. I just wish that he would love me too, the way I do. I spent a lot of time with him and everytime he makes me smile, I wished that he'll notice someday what I feel about him.
"Finn, you don't have to force yourself to love someone that will only hurt you. If I were you,I would just look at the people around me... Pay more attention to the importance that they're giving me."
He bowed his head down to my shoulders, crying more. If only there's a better way to take away the pain, I would have done it already. But sadly, this is the best thing I can do that... Whenever he needed to cry, I'm here. I will always be here for him.
After letting all of his pain out, we sat on the couch with both of our heads lowed down, looking at the floor. The atmosphere is still gloomy like earlier. Yes, he cried. But what about me? I'm just holding back my tears right now. I hate crying in front of people, especially if it's someone I really cared about.
"Finn..." I managed to say.
"What would you do if... If... If someone told you that she loved you?That, she will do everything, just to take that pain away from your heart?" I bet he still doesn't have an idea that I'm referring to MYSELF.
"I... I don't know." That was just all his response.
"What if, that someone, is your friend for a long time?"
After I finished my question, he gave me a confused look. I looked at him straight in the eye. Even though how much I tried to hold back my tears, I can't. It hurts my chest.
"Marceline... What's wrong?" He asked, sitting nearer to me.
I looked away in embarrasment and floated through the air, turning around.
"It's nothing Finn... Please remember these words, I will only say it once... I...." I shut my teary eyes closed and gritted my teeth before saying my last words.
"Love you Finn..." I said it outloud and fast. Right after that, I left Finn with confusion and closed the door behind me.
It's still raining, though earlier it was stronger. Just then I recalled the things I told Finn. I wonder what was his reaction after that. I just hope he won't feel awkward and avoid me for confessing my real feelings.
"I.... Love you Finn..."
Those words are tearing me apart. It's because I know he will never, ever feel the same feeling I've got for him. After all the time we spent together, slowly... I'm falling to him, which I knew is completely pointless. I know how much he adores PB. I don't want to see him cry. I wanted to see the usual him again, where he will always flash that joyful smile that is enough already to make my day complete.
I somehow wanted to throw these feelings away. I tried my best to ignore it, but I can't. For all of the feelings, for all of the people... Why Finn? I've already experience enough pain in this thing...
And that thing called love...
Is burning me slowly inside...
AN:Please no hate!!!!I'm just a simple Finnceline shipper okay :)