Chapter 47

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I must have fallen asleep while sitting with Clay because the next thing I knew Margret was gently shaking me. I shot up remembering where I was and afraid something had happened. The hand I was holding moved. He moved his fingers and started stroking my hand to calm me. "El calm down. Everything is okay." The one voice I had been begging to hear since yesterday comforted me. My head snapped to Clay and he sat the with that cheeky grin he always has on his face. I burst into tears. "You're awake! Oh my God Clay!" I exclaimed. He chuckled. "I'm awake."  I had tears rolling down my face. My boy was awake. And talking. I lent forward and planted my lips on his. I broke the kiss and rested my forehead to his. "I love you." I breathed. "Clay Williams I love you." He put his hands up and cupped my face. "I love you more." I smiled. "Don't ever scare me like that again. You understand me?" He smiled. "Yes ma'am." I smirked. I heard a chorus of  "awhs" I sighed. I forgot they were all in the room. "Thanks guys." I said sarcastically. They laughed. I backed up and sat back down in the chair. Jim walked towards the bed. "So what happened?" Jim asked. I looked back at Clay and waited for him to answer. He looked at the wall behind us trying to think. "I..I..I don't really remember. I remember leaving the school and driving home and then I think something ran out in front of me and I swerved to miss it.. that's all I remember." "You hit a telephone pole. That's what sent you here. Ashley called Jim who then called me and Margret then we called Elana." Adam explained. Clay just nodded. "You  have to have surgery sometime..possibly today." I whispered intertwining my hand with his again. He squeezed my hand. Just then the doctor came in the door. "Well look who has woken up and joined the party since my last visit." He greeted smirking at me. I laughed. "How is he doc?" I asked. The doctor smiled. "Considering he is up and talking is a great sign. I have been checking his vitals every two hours. They are strong and just keep getting stronger. I have an OR team ready and waiting. If he keeps getting better then he will have surgery this afternoon." The doctor explained. I nodded. I knew what was going to be done but I had to hear it from another mouth. "What exactly will be done in surgery?"  The doctor took a deep breath. "Through a midline incision we will examine the liver and gallbladder. Because his is a large laceration, I will not suture it. We will pack the laceration with a long gauze roll soaked in warm saline. I will then go in 48 hours later and remove the liver pack. For that we will have him under general anaesthesia where I will perform another laparoctomy." I nodded. Clay squeezed my hand again. I turned and looked back at him. He gave me a reassuring smile and brought my hand up to his lips and planted a kiss on it. "I'll be okay." The doctor cleared his throat. "Well that's the only update I have right now. If we decide to move forward with the surgery today a nurse will be in to prep you around 11 am." Clay nodded. "Please don't die on me." I pleaded. He smiled. "I didn;t wait this long for you to want me back to just die. I'll be fine. trust me." I looked at him shocked. He heard me? "You heard me?" I asked in disbelief. He nodded. "Every word." He said before pulling me forward and planting his lips on mine. "Yall are just so stinkin cute!" I heard Margret squeal behind me. I rolled my eyes.  "Thanks Mar." I sighed. "You should go eat." Clay suggested. I shook my head. "I'm not leaving." Clay looked at me.  "Babe I'll be fine. But you haven't ate in a while. It would make me feel better." I sighed. "Nothing will happen. Go eat." Clay ordered. Jim came up behind me. He tugged on my arm. "Go eat with Adam and Margret. I'll stay here." I reluctantly agreed getting up. Margret wrapped an arm around me. We walked out into the hall following Adam. He walked us down to the cafeteria. I decided on a biscuit and coffee. I sat down with Adam and waited for Margret to get through line. "Has anyone seen Ashley?" I asked. Adam looked unsure of something. He sighed. "I'm not sure I can tell you." I rolled my eyes. "Why not?" I asked annoyed. "Hey guys." Margret greeted walking up. I gave Adam a look before looking over at Margret. "Margret wheres Ashley?" Margret looked over at Adam before answering. "Maybe you should talk to Jim and Clay about that." I groaned. "Fine." I said getting up and heading back to Clay's room to ask them. I barged in. Jim and Clay both looked up at me. "Where's Ashley? Because nobody will tell me and tells me to ask you two and I know what that means. It's something that's going to ruin me, and it'll make me regret my decision and everything. So just tell me. Please." I said and took a deep breath. Clay looked at Jim who nodded. "Why don't you sit down?" Clay asked. I shook my head. "It won't make it better. It wont make it any easier to hear or any easier for you to say." He nodded not arguing. "She's um..she's seeing an OB." I gave a half laugh. "Can you repeat that it sounded like you said she was seeing an OB as in an Obstetrician. Meaning she's pregnant." He looked away from me, which confirmed that's exactly what he meant. I laughed. "Oh my God. Yeah, I was right. I knew I would regret this. I'm assuming it's yours?" I asked. "It was only one time! It was when I saw you with that Matt boy! It was a stupid mistake and I regret every second of it." He tried to justify. "No! You do not get to try and blame me for any of this! You had sex with her. And congratulations you have a kid." His eyes shot up to mine. "This doesn't have to change anything! Just because I have a kid with her doesn't make me want her. Kids come from broken homes all the time and turn out just fine. Elana this doesn't have to change anything for his." I shook my head. "You don't get it. Clay I love you so much, but sometimes love isn't enough. You have a baby to think about now. I don't know how many more times I can let you hurt me before I break Clay." Clay had tears streaming down his face like I did. "Elana we can make it through this. I know we can, we just have some things to work out. We can do this." I shook my head again. "Clay if I knew that everything would be perfect after this, then I would stay. But Clay how do I know something else won't come up? When I first remembered you, you had a girlfriend. Now here we are 7 months later and you have a wife and a kid on the way. What's next Clay? Is Danielle pregnant? Did yall have some secret kid you ended putting up for adoption? I mean how can we have a relationship? I can't trust you, so what is there left then?" I asked. "Please El." I heard him say. "I can't." I replied tears streaming down my face. I turned and walked out of the hospital room and out of the hospital. 

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