PROMISE ME (OSCAR DIAZ x OC)

Chapter Fifty-Four (Alana)

CHAPTER FIFTY-FOUR

Alana

ONE MONTH LATER

"How long is she going to be crashing here?" Cesar asks me while Vero is sitting on the couch watching TV and knitting a scarf. "Alana... She's knitting."

"I know. I took her to buy the yarn." I reply as I drag him toward the kitchen while I make Mia something for lunch. "Why does it matter? She cleans. She cooks. She helps out with watching Mia and she keeps to herself."

Cesar shakes his head. "She's about to have that baby soon. You realize you'll be raising her kid, Mia, and your baby all at the same time?"

"Why do you care?"

"You're my mother, Alana." The words hit hard for me.

I've been watching after Cesar and keeping him safe since he was eleven years old. He hadn't even hit puberty yet and I was the only person he had. When DCF would come knocking on that door? I had to pretend I was his 18 year old auntie who was watching out for him while Oscar was locked up. Oscar, who was also a fucking minor when he went to prison. Oscar who shouldn't have had legal rights to a literal child. All while I myself had only been a child too.

"If Oscar died would you take care of me?" I ask Cesar and he nods immediately. "Mario is working on getting a place and he's going to take her in. He just finished up his classes and graduation is around the corner for him. He never wanted to come back to Freeridge but now he has no choice. Someone has to help her and Mami and Papi aren't."

"Listen, it's just weird that they aren't."

"I know." I reply quickly. "But Luisa texted me that it has something to do with whatever they've been fighting about. And it's not about Ruby or Vero. Abuelita is clearly sick but there's something more going on with my parents. Ruby told me before they'd been fighting and that was like two years ago."

"They fought when I stayed there for a few days back when Mario had moved back in with Amber." Cesar clicks his tongue and narrows his eyes to try to remember the details. "Your mom had gotten a letter in the mail and your Dad was pissed. I think it might have been bills though."

"They've never fought about money."

He shrugs. "What else could have come in the mail that would cause them to stop sleeping in the same bed?" Cesar blinked at me. "Certainly not the same thing that's been keeping you out of the same bed with Oscar?"

I suck in a breath. "Tread lightly, Cesar."

"Why?" He crosses his arms. "You say it all the time. Oscar is my dad and you're my mom. I'm concerned for you both as my parents because I've already dealt with having no dad and losing my mom. Never knowing what a perfect family looks like until you and Oscar. I don't want that for Mia or the new baby. They deserve to know you guys as the way you truly are. Not this fucking mess you've become."

Mess... What a way to put it. We're far past a mess at this point. We've become the aftermath of an atomic bomb. If Oscar is in a room then I won't go into it. If he's with Mia then I miss out on time with my own daughter because I refuse to even breathe the same air as him while he's back to showing off that he's back with the Santos.

Making runs. Going on rides with Jose. I know the Santos aren't what they used to be but I'm terrified that now with Ruby dead? He'll break every truce and start another war. Ray is convinced it was someone in the Santos but no one's heard or said anything about it.

Ruby has been gone over a month and it's felt like years. Watching Vero walk through the baby sections in stores and seeing her lose her shimmer? Seeing the stars in her eyes go black when she turns and realizes Ruby isn't by her side to help her pick out cute outfits and crib linings for the nursery that she doesn't even have?

I swallow hard at the thought of it all. At the words that Cesar is throwing at me and I know he means well. Because this can't be easy on him either. He lost his best friend and now he's watching the only two people who ever truly loved him and raised him fall apart.

"You need to have this conversation with Oscar. He knows how to fix this and I won't allow him around me if he can't prove to me that he's truly willing to give that life up. Cesar, the day you and him walked into this house in those outfits with those haircuts again... I thought I was going to miscarry this baby. Everything went cold and dark in my entire body. Because I got the news about Ruby by a phone call from my screaming mother. I didn't want to get a phone call from anyone that you or Oscar were shot and killed. Do you understand me? I love you both so much if I lost either of you? I would never recover."

Cesar stands there and a single tear falls down his face. He wipes it away and then wraps me into his arms. "I love you, Ma. I really do." He kisses my forehead. "I can't walk away from this until I know who killed my brother. I'm not just doing this for me.. I'm doing this for Vero and her baby."

"And then what happens when the person who loved that person so much... Wants revenge too? Then I have to lose you? Just to watch Oscar go after that person? And that person's loved one go after Oscar? What do you want me to do, Cesar? I will lose all of you."

He chews his lip and shakes his head. "I want you to just talk to Oscar. Please."

"No." I shake my head. "I want him out of the Santos forever. Unless you can make that happen then I'm never speaking to him again."

I turn to walk out of the kitchen when I see Oscar standing there with roses in his hand. Tears streaming down his face. "Happy Anniversary..." He says softly.

I look at the calendar and confusion strikes me until I realize...

Today's the day that when I was fourteen years old Oscar kissed me for the first time. He was fifteen and we had snuck away from the party we had gone to. Mario had been hitting on Angelica the entire time so we knew we had just one chance.

One.

And we took it.

It's not a real anniversary to me. But apparently to Oscar it is. It was the first time we ever told each other that we liked each other and our first kiss. My actual first kiss... Oscar had kissed plenty of girls before but me? I'd never kissed anyone except my teddy bears.

"You remembered."

He nods. "I'll never forget."

Cesar inches out of the kitchen and I go back to the counter where I was making something for Mia. She's in her high chair and of course, goes crazy when she sees Oscar. He kisses her head and places the roses down onto the table.

I cut up her food and put it onto a plate before placing it in front of her. Looking at the roses on the table. Part of me wants to wrap my arms around him and hold him while I cry and tell him how much I love him and what this truly means to me.

The other part of me wants to chuck the damn roses at his head and hope that one of the thorns cuts him. So he'll bleed the way my heart has bled at the stupidity he's acted upon all this time.

He then pulls out a plush rose and hands it to Mia. "I couldn't forget about my special girl either." Mia takes it and hugs it tight, tucking it beside her while she eats her lunch.

Cesar was right.. I need to talk to him. I need to tell him how I feel and I need to do it calmly so that Mia doesn't pick up on bad vibes. I go back toward the counter and keep a close eye on her as she eats while Oscar follows me.

"Do you enjoy seeing your daughter? Seeing how happy and playful she is?"

Oscar nods. "She's the best part of my day. And so are you..."

"Right." I swallow hard. "You will never see her again if you don't end this all now. She will never be the happy and bubbly kid that she is if she loses her Daddy. I'll never recover if I lose you, Oscar. Since I was fourteen I've loved you and it's obvious you've loved me since then too."

"Mi amor, I came to a decision today." He pauses. "Sad Eyez found out who killed Ruby... But he has to play it off and it's going to take some time. I'm stepping away because I can no longer be close to that. I'm home, mi amor. Forever."