a reason to smile // seo changbin ✔️

chapter twenty-three 🔞

pride

sorry i missed last weeks update!! there will be a double update to make up for it— so stay tuned ;)

moon jieun - tuesday

mrs. cho stared at me for a moment after i finished telling her everything that happened with my parents since i last saw her. but her expression wasn't one of pity like i was expecting, it was one of... peace? that was the only way to explain the calm expression she currently looked at me with.

"have you talked about this with anyone else?" she asks. my brows raise a bit, wondering how she could have figured something like that out.

"i— well yeah..." i nod. "i told... changbin." i gave her his name. i knew she knew him, and part of me wondered if she would talk about him. but i knew she couldn't, not to mention i'd rather let changbin himself tell me about his life. he'd already given me a little bit, and i was eager for more. whenever he was comfortable of course.

"what made you want to share it with him?" she pries.

"well he... i didn't think he would judge me for it. he makes me feel.... safe." i conclude, letting my own words resonate within me.

"a month ago, you'd hardly even tell me your problems." she gives me a smile. "how does the progress make you feel?"

"it's... it's an adjustment for sure." i nod. i knew i had come far since our first session. i wouldn't sit here and deny it.

"you've started writing your own path." she smiles again.

"and even with me doing that, my mom is still gone..." i bite the inside of my cheek as the words left my lips. i wasn't a fan of the wave of vulnerability that crashed through me anytime i said something like that aloud, but i was trying to get used to it.

"your mom is also writing her own story. there will always be things out of your control, but how you respond to them is what really matters. and from what you told me, your response is perfect."

"what, crying and missing a day of classes?" i chuckle bitterly.

"taking time to grieve the relationship your parents had, and agreeing to work on things with your father." she corrects me. i nod, leaning back in my chair. "it's a domino effect. when you finally decide to work on yourself, you'll start working on things around you. like relationships, which i'm sure you're getting familiar with." she gives me a wry smile that makes me blush. did changbin tell her about me in his sessions? could she tell me that? i mean... if it has something to do with me i don't see why not...

"does changbin tell you about me?" i ask. she cocks a brow at me.

"i can't share what my other patients discuss with me." she shakes her head, a firm response that she wouldn't be telling me. so i didn't push. it was worth a shot.

"well... any wise parting advice for me this time?" i ask. she'd always given me something to think on before i left, or given me something physical to take with me.

"not today." she shakes her head, that smile creeping back onto her lips. "but i wanted to say, i'm proud of you, jieun." her tone so sincere i swear it made my heart stop. she was... proud of me?

"what?" i breathe.

"you are a smart girl, and watching you grow over the last month has been an absolute delight."

"you talk like this is our last sesssion..." my brows furrow.

"no, we still have one more under our little deal." she shakes her head.