Where Did The Little Rock-Star Go? (GXG)

Chapter 4

(Devon's POV)

Have you ever looked at someone, for the first time in along time, and  thought, 'I still love you.'? Because I do. But, is that someone with somebody else? Because if not, then at least you have a higher chance at winning them back.

I don't even know if she still loves me anymore. But I know that I still love her. I always will, no doubt about it.

This tour, it will be hard. I mean, I have to look at Jamie holding her. Kissing her. Cuddling her. Making her laugh and blush. When that should be me. Me doing those things. Not Jamie, only me

I can't help but feel jealous. I can't help but feel angry.

3 years. 3 years and these feelings still haven't gone away. I've tried and tried to move on, but nothing worked. I guess I'll always still have feelings for her. Even if she wont be mine, I'll always love her.

I sigh and close my journal, putting it under my pillow.

Yes, I still write in that stupid thing. I get up out of my bunk, wearing a tank-top and sweatpants. I quickly throw on a hoodie over my tank-top.

As I pass Alex's bunk, I catch a glimpse of something familiar. I stop and look at it.

My hoodie. My black, old, hoodie.

I smile to myself as I walk into the lounge, my phone in my hand. My smile is immediately erased at the sight. Alex on top of  Jamie. Kissing. Tongue on tongue.

I drop my phone on the floor, causing them to stop. Alex looks up at me with wide eyes.

"E-uh-sorry." I mumble, bending down to pick up my phone. I swallow the lump in my throat, blinking away the tears.

I bite my lip as I rush out of the room. As I'm practically running to the back of the room, I bump into someone- Skylar.

"Hey hey hey? What's wrong?" Skylar asks me, putting her hands on my shoulders.

"I walked in..on them kissing.." I mumble, moving past Skylar.

I run a hand through my hair as I sit down.

Don't cry. Don't cry. I've been through this before. We're not even together, so why is it bothering me? Is it because I still love her? Probably.

But I'm not going to let it get to me. I'm okay.

I take a deep breath and stand up. I put my hands in my pockets as I walk out. I walk to back into the living room, hoping they're done making out.

And they are. They're just sitting on the couch, along with everyone else.

Everyone is wearing hoodies..even though it's like, hot outside. It is cold on the bus, though. They need to fix that.

Song lyrics then pop into my head.

"I got it!" I shout, causing all of them to look at me. "Sorry, song idea." I go to my bunk and grab my notebook and pen. I then go back to the couch, sitting down next to Skylar.

Kiss me hard before you go

Summertime sadness

I just wanted you to know

That baby you're the best

That's all I have. Fuck. Think...think..

Oh! I remember Alex wearing a red dress one night, dancing in the dark pale moonlight..

I got my red dress on tonight

Dancing in the dark in the pale moonlight

Got my hair up real big beauty queen style