Chapter 29 "It's Not Okay"

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Donna's P.O.V

"Oh" was all I can say. I cant believe my eyes. I felt myself stand up even though I didn't command my legs to.

I came here coz I can't quite shake the feeling that Summer is mad at me or something.

At first, I thought telling Summer about my feelings for Abbie is the right decision. But while I was telling her about it, I suddenly thought what if it was Summer that's telling me this? That She's the one that'll use our friendship just to stop me and Abbie from having a great relationship? I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I am usually not like this. I always have known the right thing to do but with Abbie, everything is so much more complex.

It's stupid for me to use our friendship, Summer and I. I know she'll distance herself from Abbie if I tell her coz she's too kind. And I'm so stupid! Why did I do that?! Why did I even think about it?! I'm do stupid! I know she'll be hurt coz we both are in the same feeling but I did it anyway. Ugh! I'm the worst friend.

So I came here to try and fix things. I didnt really know what I was going to tell her but I just knew I needed to see her and talk to her.

But now, standing infornt of them and both smiling awhile back just before they saw me, is making me feel some foreign feeling. I can't point it out. But all I know is it hurts so much, I can't breathe.

Does she already know that Abbie likes her? Then why is she still with her? Why are they still together? WHY ARE THEY HERE IN SUMMER'S ROOM?! and why do i feel like I'm so betrayed and used?

"Don. What're you doing here?" Abbie was the first one to break the deafening silence.

"I-I.." I have nothing to say. Abbie doesn't know what Summer and I talked earlier about her. Or does she?

Having no words to say, I just smiled and laughed pathetically like I'm just so defeated. I shake my head and looked at Summers stunned reaction. I give her a fake smile but a kind one.

"Nothing. I just wanted to see Summer." I said and gulped the lump that was starting to build in my throat. Don't cry. What should I do?

Summer inhales sharp and looks away. Ashamed, I suppose. I'm so confused on what to feel right now. Summer is a great friend but I never thought she'd do it. And I'm disappointed in her. Should I be? But why should I? I'm the one thats a disappointment in our friendship. I was the one that shot first. So I feel like I deserve this.... but no... oh my god, I dont know what to feel.

Abbie smiles. Her smile looks genuine and that means she doesnt know about me and Summers encounter earlier this morning. Coz if she already know, she'd be furious now and Abbi can''t fake those kind of things.

"Oh okay." Abbie says and smiling to the both of us.

Summer remains quiet and sheepish.

"So.. Whats going on here?" I ask to both of them trying to sound enthusiastic. Ugh. Why am I doing this to my self? Should I just leave? Do I really want to know whats going on.

Summer looks at Abbie and Abbie smiles at her. Summer, however doesn't give back the smile.

"Nothing. I just wanted to see Summer, too." Abbie says confident.

Not the answer I wanted to hear. I want to know if they have confessed with each other. I think they already have.. but I still dont want to bealieve it until it comes out of their mouths. Even though theres a smaller chance that they haven't opened up their feelings, I just want to believe that.. even though... i dont know!!

"Oh." I say nodding. "Summer." I call her attention. She looks at me startled from my call. I smile at her but it was weak. "What's going on here?"

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