A Treacherous Killer-Dark Bratva Romance

thirty one

Maks

I want to go after her. I want to tell her to stay with me, to leave her parents and their wishes for her behind. But it's too late now, I saw the light dimming in her eyes when I made no move to go after her. I can't erase the image from my fucking mind. It's branded there like the image of Inessa's cold lifeless body under that stark white sheet.

I'm not good enough for her. I'm too fucked up and cold hearted. If she agreed to be with me I'd be taking her away from her parents and how could I ask that of her? She was born into a life of wealth and luxury. I was boy raised in a broken home who grew to be a heartless killer. I don't have the capability to make her happy.

I saw the way her mother looked at me like I was nothing more than a low life enforcer who would only pose a threat to her daughter's life. I suppose she was right. Nadia needed to be protected because of me. It was me who received the messages and I had dragged her into my fucked up world.

I would call Caine and relinquish my duties as her of bodyguard. He could get Leo to do the job or any other of his enforcers. I was a liability now that I allowed my feelings to get in the way.

I'm wrenched from my thoughts when Denis clears his throat. I'd almost forgotten he was still here. "I'm sorry sir," he sputters, "She insisted on coming up herself and wouldn't take no for an answer. I tried calling..."

"It's alright Denis," I say sullenly.

"I really am sorry Mr. Vasilyev." He gives me a pitying look and I realize he's sorry for his screw up and for Nadia leaving me.

"It's for the best," I say more to myself than anything.

"I really like Ms. Mirsky," he says. "Nadia I mean, not the mother. She was bit terrifying." I release a breath.

"I do hope you two work it out." He gives me a grim smile and quickly makes to leave.

I feel more alone now than I ever have in my entire life. A familiar ache has spread throughout my chest and I want to squash it before it expands.

The smell of something burning wafts up my nose and momentarily distracts me. I whip around to find the eggs I'd been cooking before were now on the verge of being cremated on the stove.

"Bylat!" I curse, rushing over to pull the pan off the burner. She hadn't even been gone ten minutes and I was already an utter mess.

I walk to my room to put some clothes on but pause when I see the door to the extra bedroom Nadia had occupied ajar. My feet carry me on their own accord and I find myself standing among her things and loathing the emptiness I feel seeing all her pink shit.

My t-shirt she had been wearing just moment ago was lying discarded on the bed. I pick it up and bring it to my nose. It smelled like my body wash mixed with some fruity perfume she had sprayed on after our shower. The smell of it causes my heart to ache and I toss the shirt back on the bed.

I can't be expected to stay here in this fucking house and sulk all day. She's fucking everywhere. Her laundry is mixed with mine, her books are lying on my coffee table, her favorite brand of  sparkling waters are in my fridge and I bet if I went in my room right now and smelt my pillow I'd smell the scent of lavender from her shampoo.

I needed a distraction, something that I have always found that alleviates some of the crushing weight that threatens to pull me under.
***
"I can't believe you dragged me here again," Leo complains. "Are ever you going to learn your lesson?"