𝓲𝓷𝓿𝓲𝓼𝓲𝓫𝓵𝓮 • 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓸𝓾𝓽𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓼

1. 𝓻𝓮𝓾𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
𝙹𝚘𝚑𝚗𝚗𝚢'𝚜 𝙿𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚅𝚒𝚎𝚠
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
"dallas?" i spoke as he walked into the living room with his head hung low. he looked miserable, empty.

once he heard my voice, his head shot up in a sudden jerk movement and he stared directly into my eyes for just a moment. the main expression on his face was unreadable. i could make out a mix of elation, sorrow, and shock.

"johnny?" he responded as the happiness began to overcome the others on his visual emotion.

all of a sudden, he darted over to me, jumping right over the couch and embracing me. but, however, his arms went straight through me.

after the unsuccessful attempt at a hug, he slowly backed away and looked into my eyes. as he did so, i remembered that i was transparent because i was dead, meaning there's no way dallas could be alive.

"johnnycakes, i'm so confused. you were dead and now you're-"

"why the hell are you like me?" i finally spoke out. the others, who were alive, seemed to not be able to hear or see us, as they continued with the siding of their wounds.

dallas took a deep breath and hovered a hand over my shoulder, symbolizing him placing it on my shoulder.

"as soon as you died, i just couldn't take it, man. i ran out the door, i robbed a grocery store, flashed my heater at the cops when confronted, and they shot me." he confessed in a low tone.

"why the hell did you flash your gun? you could still be alive and well right now! you should' ve know that they would kill ya!" i raised my voice at him.

"i did know." he spoke in almost a whisper with his head down. this was the most vulnerability i had ever seen from dallas. his cold, hatred filled eyes were rather filled with sorrow.

i began to understand fully what he meant after a moment, and i began to feel my eyes burn and fill with salty tears.

"dallas, you shouldn't have let my death get to you that much. you still could've had the gang to help you through." i tried to tell him.

"the others don't understand like you do. there's no way in hell i'd be able to get on without you, johnnycakes." he formed a faint grin after finishing his sentence.

"but how do you think two deaths in one night is affecting them? don't you think-"

"there's nothing we can do now." he interrupted me with a calm demeanor. "what's done is done. we can't change anything, y'hear?"

i nodded in response and looked up to him. i looked up to him, physically and metaphorically. dallas was my idol, though i'd never say it out loud.

i always wanted to do everything he did, be everything he was, act in every way he acted. this, however, is the first time i wouldn't.

maybe it's just the wishing i were still arrive, but if mine and his rolls were switched, i know he wouldn't want me to go off and do something stupid to get myself killed.

in unison, he and i looked over to the gang in the living room. none of them spoke. not a word was said between them.

i shook my head and looked at the ground in regret. "i wish things were different." i muttered. i slowly looked back up at him after a moment to see his response to what i said.

"you and me both johnnycakes. you and me both." he then opened his arms, indicating for a hug. i complied, and even though i knew i'd go throw, i placed my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around him.