CONNECTION BETWEEN US

Unexpected Turn

EASTH'S POV

we can't" i whispered, feeling so vulnerable

She sighed deeply

" Is it too much to ask?? I just want to be held by you once more " with shaky breath

My heart clenched on that sound, it feels like my walls crumbled in an instant

So I submit to my heart's desire and scoot closer to spoon her, my left hand gently intertwined with her right while my right sneak under her head

I felt her body relaxed under my touch, and it made every fiber on my body relaxed also

I kissed the back of her head gently

" It's not that it's too much....i just, you know how i can't control myself that much when we're alone together" i gently said tightening my grip on her hand

Bumitaw siya sa pagkakahawak ko para humarap sa'kin

Jusko po panginoon, patawarin nawa....ang lapit ng mukha niya

" Then don't...do not resist me" she slowly said ,intently looking into  my eyes...it almost like she's seducing me using her eyes

I inhaled deeply as i closed my eyes

" We know we can't...even how much we want to " i have to be strong...i need to, hindi ako pwedeng bumigay

" I don't want to cause any further damage to our friendship,Char...having you as a friend and as a co-worker is better than not having you in my life at all" my voice almost pleaded

She held my face, hindi ko man makita yong mukha niya alam kong umiiyak siya, i can hear her sobs

It lingered for a few minutes before i heard her inhaled and exhaled deeply

I opened my eyes when i felt her move

She turned her back on me, i thought she wants to sleep that way but she stands up

" Where are you going?" I panicked a little

She sniffled a sob before grabbing her stuff

" Home " she simply said

Nataranta ako when i saw her walk to the door, i immediately ran to her

" No, you can't...stay here" i said

She looked at my eyes with emotions i can't quite figure out ..anger? Sadness? I don't know

" Like you said....we can't, P'fa" she said, her voice stabilizing now

I sighed ..i don't want a fight

" Nuu, I didn't say we can't stay together...it's just, we- we need to guard ourselves " i held her face

" God knows how much i want you, fuck i could drop anything right here right now just to be with you Charlotte.." a tear rolled down my face

I leaned my forehead against hers

" But i can't let you suffer from the consequence of my actions if i were to follow my heart...kung ako lang ang magdudusa i would take it basta kasama kita eh, but no, no because you'll get involved too and i can't allow that" I cried

She freed herself from me

" You're being unfair again"

Her words confused and shocked me