Dancing with the Bullets |Ao'nung x Neteyam|

Chapter 14 (Updated)

Neteyam stands there, bright paint smeared on his cheeks, hair fluffed from the humid air, eyes wide, and mind hazy with wine. Ao'nung, standing facing him, takes a moment to collect his thoughts. The celebrations don't fade; they thump in his mind like the beating drums. As he looks at Neteyam, the weight of his feelings hangs in the air. His jaw tightens, hesitating, and Neteyam stares at him openly, unfocused, wine thumping in his veins. The sounds of laughter and music from the celebration makes Ao'nung's mind fuzzy, and he finds himself at a loss for words.

However, just as Ao'nung opens his mouth to speak, something shifts within him. He closes his mouth quickly, shaking his head. He runs a hand over his face, too, taking a long, shaky breath.

He changes his mind.

He feels like the drums are mocking him, but that's alright. He'd rather it be the music, and not Neteyam.

Neteyam, sensing the shift in the Metcayina's mood, looks at Ao'nung with concern furrowing his brows. "Is everything alright?"

Ao'nung manages a tight-lipped smile. He drops his arms beside himself and shrugs. "Yes. Let's go and enjoy the celebration."

Neteyam blinks, and a wave of disappointment washes over him. The lively celebration around him seems to lose its brilliancy and an unspoken tension lingers in the air between them, suffocating Neteyam. He tries to clear his mind, but the wine won't let him.
He had allowed himself to hope, to imagine something he barely dared to before, only to be met with silence, unspoken words – had he imagined it? The look in Ao'nung's eyes. It had seemed different for a moment. He's never looked at Neteyam like that before. Soft and yearning.

Neteyam clears his throat. "Alright."

A twinge of self-blame creeps into Neteyam's thoughts. He questions himself, feeling a pang of foolishness for allowing his heart to invest so much in the possibility of Ao'nung's confession. Instead of focusing on Ao'nung – really, he just cannot look at the Metcayina right now – he tries to locate familiar faces in the dancing crowds as they walk back to the heart of the festival.

As the celebration continues around him, Neteyam tries to shake off the disappointment, putting on a smile for those around him. If anyone realises it's a grimace, they don't mention it.

He lingers by Ao'nung's side for a while, silent, before pretending to notice someone in the crowd and slipping away.

Ao'nung startles, watching him go, disappearing out of sight.

Neteyam walks to the water – there are a few people there, watching the night sky. Some are families, some are couples, and he's the only one by himself. He tries to see his reflection, but the waves blur his features.

He kneels by the water's edge, digging his hands in. He rakes his fingers through the sand at the bottom for a while, before cupping his hands and splashing water into his face. He inhales deeply through his nose after, turning his face to the sky. He wants to whisper something to Eywa – he wants her to help, but he doesn't ask.

He cannot.

Who is he compared to Ao'nung?

He washes his face clean of the paints Ne'otse had used on him.

As he sits there by the water, he finds himself approached by three unfamiliar faces, each one wearing a welcoming smile.

"Hey, Neteyam!" One of them says, a wide grin on his face. He greets Neteyam with his hand lifted to his forehead and even offers a little bow.

Neteyam blinks, surprised. He stands up and dusts his legs off. "Hello?"

The same Metcayina boy smiles, and points to the other two young men beside him. "We noticed you at the celebration. You look like you know how to have fun."