BETELGEUSE: Do ya' hear that sound?
OTHER BETELGEUSES and MADDIES: [*laughing*]
MADDIE: That beautiful sound.
OTHER BETELGEUSES and MADDIES: [*laughing*]
BETELGEUSE: The sound of a super evil plan going down. Being bad rocks, he's in for a shock, as soon as he lifts the lid on.
ALL: Pandora's Box!
MADDIE (OTHER BETELGEUSES and MADDIE): I'm the girl with a plan (A girl with a plan!) I live to connive (She lives to connive!) And soon I'll be livin', it's almost a given that I will.
ALL: Soon be alive.
BETELGEUSE: I'll be unshackled. Come on, let's cackle. Soon I'll be-
ALL: Painting the town! Ain't it the sweetest noise around? That beautiful sound, that beautiful sound, that beautiful sound.
MADDIE: That beautiful sound!
ADAM: They're going to kill someone! Someone's gonna get killed!
BARBARA: And Levi, he can't live like this!
ADAM: I have an idea! Let's chop off their heads.
BARBARA: (a beat.) Yes.
LEVI: Who are we decapitating?
BARBARA: Beetlejuice and Maddie.
LEVI: You should! They'd love that.
ADAM: You know, hate is a very strong word. But I (a beat.) do not like them!
LEVI: Yeah. They're monsters. But she's my monster. And they gave me this.
ADAM: What is that? Is that an old book? I love old books.
BARBARA: There are two kinds of people in this world. New Car smell people...
ADAM: ...and Old Book smell people
LEVI: And we, are old book smell people.
(they sniff.)
BARBARA: Handbook For The Recently Deceased?
LEVI: I just need one of you to open it! Adam, wanna do the honors?
ADAM: Oh boy! This is exciting!
BARBARA: Levi, why did Beetlejuice and Maddie give that to you?
LEVI: I'm gonna use it to bring my mom back from the Netherworld.
BARBARA: Netherworld?
ADAM: Here we go!
LEVI: Woah!
ADAM: Woah. This is such an interesting font! Okay, chapter one. The Netherworld. All ghosts shall proceed directly to the Netherworld. Well that would've been good to know.
LEVI: Does it say anything about summonings or seances?
ADAM: Hang on. It says...we should draw a door. Now normally, I would use a plumbline for this, but I'm not too shabby with a freehand. (draws door.) It's a little crooked. Knock three times. Here goes nothing.
(knocks three times.)
LEVI: Is that the Netherworld?
ADAM: (as if he's possessed.) Netherworld.
BARBARA: Adam?
ADAM: Netherworld.
BARBARA: Adam! (closes door.) This book is dangerous!
LEVI: What no! Don't close it!
BARBARA: This is all wrong!
LEVI: I thought you were on my side!
YOU ARE READING
Beetlejuice (Male Lydia x Maddie)
FanfictionBeetlejuice tells the story of Levi Deetz, a strange and unusual teenager obsessed with the whole "being dead thing." Lucky for Levi, his new house is haunted by a recently deceased couple and a degenerate demon with a thing for stripes. When Levi c...
