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holy boob

(a/n oldie but oh whale🐋🐋)

bigdmilo: I REALLY WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ALICE A BUT SHE WONT LET ME

mermaid: toooo baddd

mermaid: I'm fucking your friend

bigdmilo: you're fucking mr. Snufflenucker

bigdmilo: you biTCh

mermaid: the fuck you talking about

mermaid: you're one wired fuckboy

bigdmilo: I'm not a fuck boy. I'm just a normal 29 year old

bigdmilo: I mean 20

mermaid: wtf

mermaid: I knew I was getting catfished

bigdmilo: you're not getting catfished

mermaid: what sourCe of fuCKerY is this

bigdmilo: I promise baby

mermaid: prove it

bigdmilo: we will skype :-)

mermaid: come again

bigdmilo: I haven't even came b4 and you're asking me to do it again

mermaid: *dances to Justin Bieber while holding up a fuckboy sign and sings I knew it*

bigdmilo: I'm not a fuckboy

bigdmilo: then you're a fuckgirl

mermaid: haha..they don't exist *note sarcasm*

bigdmilo: seriously Alice lets skype

mermaid: okey than

bigdmilo: what's your skype name?

mermaid: it's allllie.. But can we skype tomorrow I'm catching up on ahs

bigdmilo: AMERICAN HORROR STORY

bigdmilo: FUXK YES IM OFFICIALLY MARRYING YOU

mermaid: FUCK YEAH

bigdmilo: btw we can skype tomorrow

mermaid: as long as you don't show Milo

bigdmilo: not making any promises babe x ;)

mermaid: what the fuck did I just get myself into

bigdmilo: tell me about yourself

mermaid: why

bigdmilo: just showing you I'm not a fuckboy

mermaid: fine what do you want to know

bigdmilo: idk just tell me shit

mermaid: okay.

mermaid: I'm 18. I have a brother named Tanner. I have a few tattoos. I'm about to graduate. My real name is Allison but I go by Alice. My last name is Anders. Don't try to look me up and shit. I love ice-cream and music. I can sing just a bit and that's all I can think of.

bigdmilo: that's all you know about yourself ... Really

mermaid: it's hard thinking on the spot

mermaid: tell me about yourself

bigdmilo: ok

bigdmilo: I'm 20. I have a sister named Gemma. I'm obsessed with kittens. (They're so fucking cute OMG). I really have a daddy kink incase you thought it was fake. I love muffins and I have many many tattoos.