Fight For Me.

Chapter 4, Awakening.

You woke up screaming, panicked, and scared. What the hell was that?! All you could think about were those eyes, and that smile... The things that once called out to you with such kindness and friendship, the things that always stood out to you...Those were now the two things that manifested to you, whenever Karkat would cross your mind no matter what you thought. You texted your best friend, Jade Harley, if she could come get you later, that it was important that she did. While you were stuck in your own mind, you vaguely hear Karkat banging on your door, probably reacting from your screaming. Honestly, with what happened with that dream, he's the last person you want to see. You couldn't figure out what to say to him, how to tell him about your strangely realistic dream. 

The next thing you know, he's in your room. You hadn't realized you were crying until he asked "Fuckwad why the fuck are you crying?! What the fuck happened?! Why the fuck did you scream like that?!" He started walking over to you, but when he came close enough to touch you, you flinched away from him. "I... I don't.. I don't know how to tell you.. I just... please leave..." "The hell I'll leave. Something is fucking wrong and I wanna know why the fuck you flinched when I tried to touch you. You've NEVER flinched from me before. What. The. Fuck. Happened." He seethed at you. You can't do this, you tell yourself. You can't just tell him what happened. He'll laugh at you, tell you it was just a dream and all in your mind. But what if it's true? What if he gets like that when he's angry? What if he can't control himself when he's like that? What if you tell him, and that triggers his aggression, that you'd even doubt him? 

He snaps his fingers in front of your face, and you get startled. "Tell me what happened. Right here. Right now." He sat down beside you, leaving some room because he didn't want to make you uncomfortable. You scoot a bit farther from him, and the expression he makes breaks your heart. How can you do this to him? He's never once actually hurt you. Not once. But yet here you are, doubting his every movement and word because of a DREAM that you had, that has no chance of coming true. Or so you hoped...

You snapped back into attention when you felt his hand on your arm. You tensed up enough to where he could tell, but forced yourself to relax. You had to tell him. No matter what he thought of you. You took 5 deep breaths and told him. Told him every gory and disgusting detail of your dream. You described what he looked like, and what he tried to do to you. What he told you about the trolls and about their anger. How you had begun to doubt yourself. You shiver slightly because going back into that dream, it was so frightening. It was like your were allowing it  to take over your life, allowing it out of the dreamscape and inviting it into your home, your room, your body and soul. It was just so terrifying that you'd have to stop mid sentence and just breath, chasing away the tears that threatened to come. His reactions.. you felt so bad. He was looking at you like he had actually done this to you, had touched you like that and had hurt you like that. You wanted to soothe him, to tell him none of it was his fault.. but you couldn't, at least not yet. You had to tell him the full story. You had to explain to him everything. You still wanted to be with him sure, but you were just so afraid of this right now, that you didn't know how you would react right now. He listened to every thing you said, true to his word earlier that night. His eyes were trained on you, bright red eyes with pupils. You remind yourself, that he's different. This Karkat wasn't the Karkat in your dream. There were so many differences about him now. How he was kind, his eyes, his mouth, and how it didn't smile like the other did. You knew, deep down they were different, but you were still so scared. What if he snapped? But he didn't. He listened to you calmly, only interrupting ever so often to ask a question. "Did I- He really try to do that to you?..." You nodded and looked away. Ashamed that you let that happen to you, ashamed that it could've been a lot worse if he wanted it to be. Karkat pulled your face toward him. "Hey shit head... I'll never do those things to you ok? I swear it on my blood pumper that I would never touch you like that without consent, that I would always respect you and never do anything degrading to you, or your mental stability." 

You look deep into his eyes, and start crying. You knew right then, you can trust this troll. You believed him when he said that. You've known he's never been good with his feelings, but the sincerity radiating from his eyes was enough to have you trust him. Trust him with your heart, your mind, and your life. You pull him close to you and hug him tight, not wanting to sleep alone after that dream. "H-hey... Would you mind.. um.. staying with me... so I don't have to.. uh... sleep alone.. and possibly face that um.. dream again?..." You ask, whispering awkwardly. He blushed a very very bright red, it was so cute. You surprise yourself with this thought, that you'd think of something as silly as that after all of what happened to you. "Y-yeah.. just don't try anything funny, buldge licker..." You look midly surprised "KARKAT!!!" As you playfully slap his chest, feeling better now that you told him everything, you don't feel that weight on you anymore. You both climb under the sheet and drift into a peaceful, and you mean a peaceful sleep this time.