You Said Forever

Husk

Deku felt like a burden. His arms were an eighth of the size they once had been, it was hard for him to lift his spoon from his bowl to his lips. Every time his eyes met Ochaco's, he didn't see the admiration he was used to, only pity. Everyone talked to him like he was a kid, everyone danced around his feelings, and so he had no idea what was going on, which kept him in a pretty much constant state of paranoia. He was sitting in the hospital bed with Ochaco, he slipped an arm around Ochaco's shoulders, pulling her close and kissing her head. He frowned as she tensed and pulled away.

"Sorry." he sighed "I-I keep forgetting you don't like it when I touch you anymore."

Ochaco frowned, "that's not true." she murmured

Deku was quiet as he hugged his knees to his chest, "I-I knew I would lose a lot after I lost my quirk, I never thought I would lose you with it."

Ochaco frowned, "What do you mean?"

"You're disgusted with me. You shrink away from me when I try to hold you, I can see in your eyes that you're here because of guilt."

"Do you think I like seeing you like this? You're sick, and weak, constantly paranoid. I'm worried about you."

Deku hugged himself sadly, "you tense up every time I touch you."

"I-I'm sorry." her voice was soft, "It's nothing personal I promise." she sighed

Deku sighed, two years, so much could change in two years. He just hadn't thought her feelings for him could. "Y-you've been sleeping in my hospital bed with me." He murmured

"You said you wanted to wake up next to me."

"Is there someone else?" he sighed

"No." The lie came to her lips too easily, she was disgusted with herself.

Deku sighed "I'm sorry, Ochaco I just- I thought, y-you sleep here with me because you don't want to go home to sleep next to the person you've been with these past couple of years.. I guess I'm just so insecure, now without a quirk, and all skinny and weak.. Th-that I assumed you'd been trying to decide whether or not you'll stay once I'm discharged from the hospital. I've lost so much, you showed the slightest chance at leaving, and I just started to prepare myself."

Ochaco wiped her eyes, trying to hold in her sobs

"No! No! I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to make you cry!" Deku felt so bad, here Ochaco was trying to make him feel better, and he was accusing her of things.

"Do you talk to Kacchan a lot?" Deku murmured, "I'm worried he's disappointed in me, he hasn't been here to visit as much as I thought he would be." Deku assumed that Bakugo was angry with him for being careless enough to lose One for All, or maybe angry with himself for taking so long to find him. He supposed he didn't know, but he was worried about his friend.

Ochaco sighed "It's just hard for all of us to see you this way, Deku." Ochaco wanted to tell him but the window to do that was closed now, and she also felt like if she did that when Bakugo wasn't around it would be betraying him.

Ochaco was a mess, she loved Deku, his arms felt like home, and talking to him was so easy. She felt like both of them helped her grow in different ways, and they both made her so happy. She had promised Katsuki she would spend her life with him, but he didn't seem to want that anymore, and she wasn't entirely sure what she wanted. She loved them both so much, and she didn't want to hurt anyone, but she didn't have much of a choice at this point. She hugged herself sadly.

Deku frowned, "S-since I don't have a quirk anymore.. I can't really be a pro hero anymore."

"Don't say that I'm sure that-"