Dead Laugh House

Hello everyone, this isn't mine, it is from BigFatCrackshipWriter2048atcum_uzb_com on AO3, and was nice to let me post it on Wattpad, so please enjoy their masterpiece and check them out, link in the description or at the end.

little mentioned: this au is where N didn't get mind-wiped from Cyn.

"Brain-dead moron" V muttered to herself as she rounded a corner down a narrowing street, her visor indicating that her destination was just 7 minutes south of where she was. Missing her call's is something she'd expected from him, she's only spent her entire miserable life around him, she knows what his habits are. Missing four of them though? One after another? No, something's clearly gone wrong here.

"He either found another one of his stupid knick-knacks and is busy worshipping it, somehow found a worker colony, or he's dead". As V pondered which of the 3 events had likely taken place, she felt something slip out of her pocket.

Looking down, V gasped as she quickly grabbed the dropped object and brought it close to her face, examining it thoroughly for potential damage. It was a small newspaper bundle which had been neatly wrapped in scotch tape to the best of her abilities with a tiny piece of blue ribbon tied into a bow taped to it. This was the dumbass's birthday gift, of which she was going to tell him she spent painstaking hours looking for (she found it unintentionally while butchering a worker drone, but he doesn't need to know that part).

Oddly enough the hardest part about securing the gift wasn't the blue bow she had stolen off J (J is a real thick bitch deep down, probably still doesn't even know V took it), but the newspaper she had used as wrapping paper. It had taken her days of her free time to find anything that wasn't soggy or falling apart. It was worth it though, N would love it.

Once satisfied with the sustained perfection of the gift, V continued her pilgrimage to N's last known location. She really wasn't supposed to be doing this, breaking the grid-like system J and her had painstakingly setup over so many long mornings to maximize the efficiency of locating worker drones in such compact areas.

Well... actually it was J that mapped it out and setup the system, V mostly just stood around and nodded whenever J prompted her to agree with whatever she said. V, as is her style, then proceeded to gloat in front of N about the system "she" had developed all on her own accord.

She risked getting her ass kicked by their "superior" for such casual disrespect, but it was kind of worth it to see N stare at her in amazement as she proudly revealed "her" genius system, his eyes glittering at her and remarking on how smart (and beautiful) she was.

If she hadn't known N for as long as she did, she would have thought he was just really good at playing along with a joke; but no, he actually believed her when she said it was all her idea. He's so stupid, he's such a massive brain-dead idiot she can barely stand it half the time.

V didn't want to think about what her life would be like if she didn't have him.

Breaking her train of thought, V's visor had notified her that she had arrived at N's location. Before her stood a tall, imposing, dilapidated suburban house that had not stood up to the elements very well. Paint long since peeled away, windows smashed in and out, a roof that looks like it could cave in at any moment.

If they weren't so desperate to up their quota, N wouldn't even have bothered looking at the place.

Walking up the steps and pulling open the front door, V stepped inside to the large, spacious living room of the building. Pitch black aside from the little light cast by Copper's night sky, V's infrared vision automatically came online and her visor lit up as the room fully came into view. Lazily scanning the room side-to-side looking for signs of N's intrusion, V saw something that made the remnants of her prior anger melt away as she gave out a snort of laughter.