Tainted

10

~Poppy~

I didn't say much last night. Told my dad I'd had fun, we had dinner, he took me to the exhibit didn't lay a finger on me other than the kiss on the cheek he saw. That he wants to take me out again soon. Nothing to worry him, in fact, it was the first night in 2 weeks he didn't touch me. Cian didn't take me upstairs. I wasn't left tied to my bed over night as some stupid fucking intense training because of course, Sebastian was going to want more from me and it was 'better that I was prepared' and that 'someone he trusted showed me it first'. Tie me to my bed for 18 hours a day beat me to a pulp. Break a few of my ribs, cover me in bruises and disgusting hickies from something that cannot be described as sex.

Wednesday afternoon I was pulled out of those fucking restraints and my mother did everything to get rid of the bruises. We tried everything. All Wednesday, all of Thursday, all day yesterday. But they were heavy set and weren't fading any time soon. Somehow that was out fault and although my dad did nothing more than pin me to the wall by my throat until I passed out, my mother looked horrendous.

I sit at the kitchen island, staring at the flowers Sebastian sent on Friday morning. Sunflowers and roses. No one had sent me flowers before. And he just so happened to choose my favourites. To take me to a room filled with them. Without knowing me. He said he knew it was what I needed. He didn't know me but he knew what I needed and sure enough, that room had given me something I was about to give up hope for.

My father left for his golf game at the club and my mother practically ran across the room to me, wrapping her arms around me until I yelped at the pressure on my ribs.

"How did it go?" She dragged a stool across the space sinking down into it beside me. "Did he-"

"No. No, he was- he was brilliant. A perfect gentleman. Food was good. I didn't say much but he kept asking questions and it wasn't massively awkward and then he took me to this Van Gogh exhibit that was beautiful. It was just us there and there was one room just packed full of sunflowers and we just laid surrounded by them in silence for about half an hour and it was like being in a messed-up fever dream. Then we left and sat with some mozzarella sticks because I didn't eat much and we talked for ages." I sighed, sitting up from tracing the flowers gently and turned to her. "Is he that bad mum?" She nodded once.

"Worse than your dad." I pressed my lips together tightly. "The thing is though Pops he hasn't done this before. Sebastian doesn't date. He keeps to himself. He's a brutal man, doesn't spare people, doesn't care if they have nothing to do with it. If it will get him what he wants he'd happily burn down an orphanage. He's said that himself."

"He hasn't given me the slightest sign he's like that."

"Really?"

"He saw the bruises mum. He wants me to choose."

"Choose what?"

"If I want to marry him or not. He said he doesn't want me here. He doesn't like it. What Cian does. He told me about the other men dad's talking to about it. Is he really the worst of the 3? A man who's killed his last 4 wives and a man who's current kids will likely kill mine. Over someone who's saved my life twice before he even knew who I was and hasn't given me a reason not to believe he would be different." My mum rubbed my back softly. "I don't know what to do. Certain death, watch my children be slaughtered or potentially get trapped in a marriage with the most dangerous man in the country. At least with him I get a choice right? That's not something the other 2 are offering. They see me as something to be bought but Sebastian isn't he asked me if I wanted him to take me out. Before he went to dad. He read my book because I apparently made it look interesting. It's 700 pages mum. He read a 700-page book for a girl he wasn't going to see again and didn't even know the name of. He took me to an art exhibit because he knew it was something I'd like, from asking questions about me. The 2 times we've spoken properly he hasn't done anything but ask me to tell him more about myself. I've refused, given him shitty one-word answers and he didn't stop. If he was anyone else in the world we'd be sat here saying he sounds amazing. And outside of everyone else's knowledge of him, I haven't been given a reason not to believe he's anything other than kind, polite, caring, he's a good listener." My mother sighed, watching as I pulled a rose out of the vase and started pulling the petals off one at a time.

"You believe him?"

"I don't know. But do I have another choice here? In reality. The other 2 are guaranteed misery mum. I'm not saying he's going to make me happy but in this life is there really anyone that is happy? Surely the man that hasn't touched a woman is better than the one who's killed 4? I don't know mum. He's offering me something when everyone else just forces me through it."

"Or he could be luring you for it to be worse than you're expecting, letting him have the chance to say you signed up for it." I looked up from the rose, yanking the rest of the petals out and dropping them onto the countertop.

"But maybe, he won't be expecting me to be concerned and I'll have a chance at getting out. At getting us out."

"No Pops. If you get out of this you go. I've told you that."

"I'm not leaving you here mum."

"Yes. You are. That's not a request. If you marry Sebastian and find a way to leave and survive it, you do not come back Poppy." She grabbed my face. "Ever. You do not come back for anything."

"Mum-"

"No Poppy. I am not arguing over this babe. If Sebastian is like I'm expecting him to be, you find a way out. You find a way out and you build yourself a life outside of this and you do not come back for me. Ever. Promise me that Poppy."

"Okay mum. Okay." I shook my head, pulling her into my arms and holding onto her tight. I have to find a way to get us both out. I'm not going without her.