I thought about dieing today. I thought about trying again this morning and what that would mean.
My dad told me that one day I'll want someone all to myself. No poly. No sharing. I'll want every piece of them to be mine. I thought a lot about monogamy today. I wondered why I want to give up my poly lifestyle? For her? I don't understand.
For a long time I thought (after the break up) that I didn't want to be poly any longer. All I wanted was her. Totally and completely, I was willing to give all of it up.
I'm very confused today.
I embarrassed the fuck out of myself by crying in front of the whole class. I ran out, cried for an hour in the bathroom.
Is it bc I'm still in love. Or bc she has moved on?
I don't feel stable right now.
I want to just... go home... not be alone... I wanna kill myself again... do I?
YOU ARE READING
Minds Eye
Non-FictionThis is not a story, this is my life. My journey to self-love, my opinions and trials that are all here to be read by you. Enjoy.
