Dreamily ETERNAL

Isolation

I stood still with my eyes closed, waiting for my heart to come to terms with the rest of my body. I imagined myself inside a cave lit dimly by orange light, probably from lanterns or flame torches. I stood at a darker end of the space and watched an old man in a cream-coloured robe at the majorly illuminated front. He paced in the silence while his fingers navigated his long white beard. My brain, as nasty as it always was, wanted to manifest an idea of the elderly's tapering digit coursing slowly into the cavity of my Gary Glitter. I cursed it and reminded it why we were here. That was successful in pushing aside the thoughts on ass fuck.

I wasn't physically inside the cave yet, thanks to my soul that had insisted that we needed to visit home before anything. At the same time, I had a gut feeling that my soul would betray me and make it back to the limp body that I once occupied. I didn't know whether it was still on my former bed or in a hospital or a grave. Or...it could have been the one I was with that moment, though I asked myself why my spirit yearned so hard to get back home into another tangible body.

I knew nothing in my very recent past. I didn't know whether I was dead or not. All my concentration was targeted at knowing this new life better. It was worth it. It was interesting how I wanted to acknowledge that this was no longer a dream to me but something just similar in some way or many.

“You got to put your thoughts together young lad otherwise, I see you're wasting my time here.” The geezer spoke, his voice rough and deep with a tint of old age. Immediately, I snapped out of the barrage of thoughts that waved within my unsettled mind. I'd tried as much as possible to keep it in line with what was at hand but it was naturally so vulnerable to derailment.

When the old guy turned to look at me, I refocused. If it hadn't been for his reard, I wouldn't have brought myself together. ‘I want to know where I am.’ Swiftly, my brain brought up the question, knowing that this bloke could hear me telepathically.

“Where are you?” What?...

“Where do you want to be?” He asked another one.

‘I want to be here, please. Please, house me as I figure out this nonsense and...’

“It's up to you.” He cut in. “Everything is up to you.” He added and began approaching me with authority in his movement. He was an old codger. Could he have been a respectable spirit of some hierarchy? A smile crept on his wrinkled face when he got nearer. I kept my focus on him, not wanting to blink and consequently leave this partially dreamy realm. My wait for more information from him was in vain since my mind ran out of questions and all I had been left with was to admire how calm he presented himself—as if he were trying to indicate to me that I was going to be fine. Everything was going to be fine. That's all his look could say. Perhaps, that's what he thought and if he did exactly so, then I'd read his mind.

Wow. I applauded myself for knowing that or better, I felt excited at the development.

The old bloke's smile remained steady for as many seconds as possible not until I realised that he'd stilled?...His figure remained that way without a twitch. He'd become a piece of art. I refused to blink. Any flap of my lids would mean opening my eyes out of the illusion I'd created and back to the outside of this cave. Damn, it could as well take me back to the miserable life my soul was still longing for. I could still sense the unease in my chest.

Meanwhile, in the corner of my eye, I perceived a moving form to which my full sight shifted not to miss out on anything that was going on inside the room. I saw the codger's figure disappearing at one corner though every ounce in me to stop him from leaving felt tied or suppressed. In another sense, I felt like my interest in him was no more and so I didn't strongly protest his departure. But a part of me didn't want him to go either. I'd positioned myself like a child to him who needed care and guidance, not abandonment.