Defeated (Book 1)

Prolouge

"If you said you loved me why would you continue to hurt me?" I was sitting on the couch at 2:34 am when my longtime boyfriend walked in.

He looked like he had seen a ghost, I chuckled while shaking my head.

I had a glass of red wine on the table, contemplating on if I should aim it straight for his head or keep my peace.

I stood up making sure I grabbed the bottle and I threw it hard towards him.

"What the hell!"

He ducked just in time it hit the door shattering making a piercing noise to my ears, the red wine staining the white door dripping down slowly.

He started to come near me,
"Baby look, I know you getting tired of me say-" I held my hand up stopping him from talking.

"No! You look and listen I'm getting sick and tired of your bull! You coming home late nights smelling like perfume that damn sure ain't min-" Throughout my sentence I realize what's the reason of arguing with this man, he doesn't deserve me, I'm worth more than what he treats me like.

"I just want to say this, Antonio I'm leaving.... I can't argue anymore, stress, cry my eyes out over you when you do nothing but treat me like I don't exist anymore, I'm so drained just being with you" I knew by walking away will only be my only option out, my tears, heartaches can't fix us so why continue?

I need someone who will actually treat me like I am somebody. Someone who will acknowledge me, protect me, be there for me when they say they will.

"Baby don't do this to me" I was walking to our room when grabbed my wrists.

I looked down not wanting to look into his eye's and fall for his words again.

I yanked my wrists away and sauntered away to our room grabbing everything I owned cautiously putting them in my suitcase and bags.

I kept walking back and forth putting clothes, shoes, make up, hair products and my personal items in.

"Baby please don't leave me! I know I've been messing up with us but I can fix it please I'm sorry!" He begged.

"Antonio nothing can fix us! You made the decisions you made... You decided to go and cheat, you decided to stay out late at night and do whatever..... You even forgot my birthday. Remember that day you promised we'll have movie night? Where were you? Remember you promised to take me out and we have us a couples night just us two alone? Where were you? I waited hours for you to come home! I'm done and fed up!"

I was truly weakened by this man.

He constantly lied to my face about his whereabouts, how could I trust someone I once fell deeply in love with but couldn't keep it real with me.

I was finished with my packing now, I was now heading towards the door with my bags ready to leave, but Tonio was blocking it.

"Move " I spoke with gritted teeth.

"You can't leave, I'll find a way to fix this I promise just give me one more chance." Sympathy was written all over his face but I had to look away.

"Please move, I'm just so tired of being hurt. And now I'm done... I'm Defeated."

"If you loved me you wouldn't leave" Shocking me with his comment.

I finally let a tear slide down my cheek, making more follow.

"If you love me, you wouldn't have done those things you promised you wouldn't do." It was silent after what I said.

I know it struck him deep but he has to know how I'm feeling.

Lord knows I've been hurt and I finally want out.

"Say you don't love me anymore, I'll let you go" My eyes widened, I did the only thing I could do.

"I don't love you anymore..." Lies, lies, lies.

That's what I did.

I had to.

He let a tear drop from his eyes, he gave me one last kiss on my forehead, he shook his head then moved out of my way.

I picked up my bags, after making sure I had everything I didn't look back.

"If you loved me